Michellerella plus one have been invited to the ball!! Okay.....not really. I mean yes, we were invited to the ball but we had to buy our tix. No biggie. School fundraiser and good cause. I go through my closet looking at dress after dress. There are easily 10 gorgeous dresses to wear that all come with an excuse as to why I can't wear them. Too sexy, wrong fabric, outdated, etc. Oh how I wish I had some mouse friends to "update" my not-so-current pretty dress! The last thing I want to do is buy another one-time-wear with a hefty price tag! What's a girl to do?
My so-called problem started a month ago when another mom mentioned that anyone who isn't wearing a floor-length gown looks "out of place." Okay.....I don't wear floor length gowns period. Or ever for that matter! Okay...my wedding was an exception but that dress wasn't typical wedding attire (thank you Ralph Lauren!)I guess I could wear this dress. It's floor length and drop-dead gorgeous and I would really get my monies worth out of it since I got to wear it a second time at the Black & White Ball. I mean seriously, who gets to wear their wedding dress twice? Third time's a charm, right? Nope. I've decided its too dressy, or just an excuse to buy something. You make the call.
I have my heart set on an amazing tuxedo-style dress. It's a halter wrap dress with a folded collar, single button closure and slight tail in the back. It would really show off the back and arms. Sexy yet very simple and sophisticated. Affordable price. I picture myself rocking this dress with Rihanna-esque hair (remember, I have the shorter do now)and booties. So what's the problem? I'm 5 feet tall and by the time I make all the necessary adjustments, I might as well have bought the floor-length gown that I don't want to spend the money on.
Okay.....so I go about my way again, trying to find the perfect dress. Or better yet, finding a dress that I will FOR SURE wear again sometime in the near future--date night, etc. I find a really inexpensive jersey dress that has the most A-M-A-Z-I-N-G back detail. Paired with my equally fabulous Barbara Bui heels and I think it could look like a million bucks. However, since the front of the dress is just your basic LBD, I decide to keep looking.
The key to finding this perfect dress is to also stick within my budget. I don't want to spend more than $500. Many of you are probably thinking I am crazy, but oh well. I don't go out that often, let alone formal affairs, so I refuse to spend a lot of money on a dress that will simply look beautiful in my closet and collect dust. Or perhaps some think I am spending too much? Either way, this makes the task that much more daunting....
OMG-I find the dress! Its simple. It's just slightly above the knee. It requires ZERO alterations. It was fate-the only dress of its kind and in MY SIZE! Folks-if I look "out of place" then so be it! I will be the most savviest of savvy chicks out there! Marc Jacobs comes to the rescue!! Let me rephrase-Marc by Marc Jacobs. Lower price point! One shoulder dress-VERY CURRENT and way under my budget! Put together with my faboosh heels and voila!
Michellerella plus one get to go to the ball! But unlike Cinderella, this girl gets to keep the dress and the prince past midnight!
A day in the life of a new Kindergarten Mom. With two little ones going to school, this SF Mom discovers that it's not all play. The adventure begins at the sound of a bell-literally! Step in this mom's shoes as she walks, run, eats, and kills to be the Super Mom and Wife that she was born to be.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Peer Pressure
As a parent, I am as over protective as they get. I am very selective as to whom I leave my kids with, when, and where. Even though my mom picks up my daughter from school twice a week, I still call her to remind her on those mornings. I have only left my kids 2x in their lives-and the first time was just last year. I don't have a regular babysitter, and aside from my parents, I don't trust anyone to care for my kids. Yes-they go to camps and activities, but I am speaking specifically about date nights, sleepovers, etc. I love my kids more than anything in this world. Probably even more than myself and my husband. I eat, sleep, breathe my kids. Healthy? Probably not, but I am getting better. Since I have taken up running, I actually get away and make time to run which means getting away.
I attend every single extra curricular activity, school function, and am very active in their schools. When I see a mean kid, I am on it. Pushing/shoving--on that too. Anyone being rude to my kid-on it. But now that my oldest has started kindergarten, I can't be on it like I used to. She is in an environment for most of the day without me, left to take care of herself. I can't protect her anymore. I have to hope that I have instilled in her good values about life and most importantly, confidence and a sense of security within herself.
Today, my daughter came home to tell me that a 3rd Grader had told her that a Kindergarten Parent was taking all the Halloween candy away from the school carnival. She then went on to ask if I was that mom. I immediately snapped, "What? Who told you that?" I was very upset. For starters, this is NOT true. But what really bothered me is that a 3rd grader said this to Lola (not knowing I was the Kindergarten parent or maybe she did?)
What really, really bothers me is that this 3rd Grader most likely got her information from her mother-who btw, emailed me begging for candy at the carnival after she spent a paragraph talking about how bad her daughter's hygiene is. WTF? Okay-first of all, what parent actually sits their kid down and says, "Honey. The Halloween carnival isn't going to have candy this year. Do you still want to go?" This parent emphasized to me via email how her daughter "'has really bad teeth, very thin enamel'" yet is not happy that I am providing a healthier school carnival format??!! Does this make any sense? I would think a parent would appreciate that a)someone is taking the time to consider healthy options for the students and b) that someone is making a conscious effort of promoting healthy eating. BUT NOOOOOOO. I get my face ripped off because there is no candy--and this part is simply not true! Yes-I have eliminated the sodas filled with high fructose syrup, no slushies, no cotton candy. But did I mention that we are having natural sodas (do the kids notice the difference) and caramel/candy apples? We have an entire edible science lab filled with candy delectables and a table designated for homemade baked sweets (Hilda's Horrible Treats!)? Okay, so I am not passing out Snickers Bars, but trust me, there is enough sugary things to go around and frankly, if my child had "really bad teeth" the last thing I would be complaining about is lack of candy for her to ingest. If anything, I would welcome a healthy change!
What I have learned in Chairing my first BIG event is that I WILL NEVER CHAIR ANY EVENT EVER AGAIN. Its impossible to please everyone and you can't help but to make enemies along the way. I thought I was doing a service to the school but instead I have had to deal with way too many egos. I know this happens at every school, with every event, etc. but call me naive, I just didn't think it would happen to me. I have put so much thought into this event, so much creativity and vision, but nobody cares. They would rather bitch about having a healthier menu than embracing it. Instead of being part of a new generation,or welcoming new ideas and new blood (no Halloween pun intended)or just simply being grateful that someone actually cares about the kids, its been grief, anxiety, and now its on the playground and has reached my kid. That's where I draw the line. Fuck with me all you want. Don't fuck with my kid. I will KILL for my kid. I don't care who you are or how old you are, but FUCK with my kid and you'll be sorry.
Today was her first test and I am sure there are more to come. I did not expect her to stick up for me, but a part of me wishes she had. My daughter's feelings were hurt and she's upset with me because she thinks I am ruining Halloween! How can this be? I am doing my best to make sure it's a fantastic event?? She knows exactly what is going to be at the carnival. Why didn't she speak up and tell this girl she was wrong?! Was she intimidated by this older girl? Probably. I have got to get through to her that she has a voice, an opinion and she can express that! Right or wrong-she can say something! She needs to speak her mind and not let these MEAN people get to her.
My daughter LOVES to get manicures. She was so excited to see Elsa (manicurist) this Saturday and have her nails painted a special way for Halloween (Black & Orange) She went to school and I guess some girls were telling her this and that about her nails. She came home and actually asked me to remove the polish! I refused and I told her not to listen to them. She went on and on that these girls said she couldn't paint her nails, etc. Not a teacher--KIDS. Most likely jealous kids who have now given my innocent child a complex about her painted fingernails. I caught her literally trying to peel away at the polish!
Peer pressure is something new for us as a family but something you all should think about. But unfortunately its a battle that we can't fight for our kids on the playground. As parents, we need to do our best to teach our children how wonderful they are inside and out. We need to teach them that they are unique individuals and that they do not have to be like everyone else. I thought I had given my daughter a good foundation but I obviously have my work cut out. Think about it with your own kids before its too late. If I had my way, I would confront every single one of these mean girls and their parents! I am so tempted to email this mom who's child is spreading nonsense on the playground! But I have to take the high road. I have to set an example for my child, no matter how hard it is. I have to teach her to keep her head up and remain strong. Parents/Friends--remember this!!! I have always thought of my kid as confident, independent and strong willed. Maybe she was having an off day today, but regardless, it's not preschool anymore. It's the REAL WORLD, and unfortunately for our kids, the world isn't getting better.
I attend every single extra curricular activity, school function, and am very active in their schools. When I see a mean kid, I am on it. Pushing/shoving--on that too. Anyone being rude to my kid-on it. But now that my oldest has started kindergarten, I can't be on it like I used to. She is in an environment for most of the day without me, left to take care of herself. I can't protect her anymore. I have to hope that I have instilled in her good values about life and most importantly, confidence and a sense of security within herself.
Today, my daughter came home to tell me that a 3rd Grader had told her that a Kindergarten Parent was taking all the Halloween candy away from the school carnival. She then went on to ask if I was that mom. I immediately snapped, "What? Who told you that?" I was very upset. For starters, this is NOT true. But what really bothered me is that a 3rd grader said this to Lola (not knowing I was the Kindergarten parent or maybe she did?)
What really, really bothers me is that this 3rd Grader most likely got her information from her mother-who btw, emailed me begging for candy at the carnival after she spent a paragraph talking about how bad her daughter's hygiene is. WTF? Okay-first of all, what parent actually sits their kid down and says, "Honey. The Halloween carnival isn't going to have candy this year. Do you still want to go?" This parent emphasized to me via email how her daughter "'has really bad teeth, very thin enamel'" yet is not happy that I am providing a healthier school carnival format??!! Does this make any sense? I would think a parent would appreciate that a)someone is taking the time to consider healthy options for the students and b) that someone is making a conscious effort of promoting healthy eating. BUT NOOOOOOO. I get my face ripped off because there is no candy--and this part is simply not true! Yes-I have eliminated the sodas filled with high fructose syrup, no slushies, no cotton candy. But did I mention that we are having natural sodas (do the kids notice the difference) and caramel/candy apples? We have an entire edible science lab filled with candy delectables and a table designated for homemade baked sweets (Hilda's Horrible Treats!)? Okay, so I am not passing out Snickers Bars, but trust me, there is enough sugary things to go around and frankly, if my child had "really bad teeth" the last thing I would be complaining about is lack of candy for her to ingest. If anything, I would welcome a healthy change!
What I have learned in Chairing my first BIG event is that I WILL NEVER CHAIR ANY EVENT EVER AGAIN. Its impossible to please everyone and you can't help but to make enemies along the way. I thought I was doing a service to the school but instead I have had to deal with way too many egos. I know this happens at every school, with every event, etc. but call me naive, I just didn't think it would happen to me. I have put so much thought into this event, so much creativity and vision, but nobody cares. They would rather bitch about having a healthier menu than embracing it. Instead of being part of a new generation,or welcoming new ideas and new blood (no Halloween pun intended)or just simply being grateful that someone actually cares about the kids, its been grief, anxiety, and now its on the playground and has reached my kid. That's where I draw the line. Fuck with me all you want. Don't fuck with my kid. I will KILL for my kid. I don't care who you are or how old you are, but FUCK with my kid and you'll be sorry.
Today was her first test and I am sure there are more to come. I did not expect her to stick up for me, but a part of me wishes she had. My daughter's feelings were hurt and she's upset with me because she thinks I am ruining Halloween! How can this be? I am doing my best to make sure it's a fantastic event?? She knows exactly what is going to be at the carnival. Why didn't she speak up and tell this girl she was wrong?! Was she intimidated by this older girl? Probably. I have got to get through to her that she has a voice, an opinion and she can express that! Right or wrong-she can say something! She needs to speak her mind and not let these MEAN people get to her.
My daughter LOVES to get manicures. She was so excited to see Elsa (manicurist) this Saturday and have her nails painted a special way for Halloween (Black & Orange) She went to school and I guess some girls were telling her this and that about her nails. She came home and actually asked me to remove the polish! I refused and I told her not to listen to them. She went on and on that these girls said she couldn't paint her nails, etc. Not a teacher--KIDS. Most likely jealous kids who have now given my innocent child a complex about her painted fingernails. I caught her literally trying to peel away at the polish!
Peer pressure is something new for us as a family but something you all should think about. But unfortunately its a battle that we can't fight for our kids on the playground. As parents, we need to do our best to teach our children how wonderful they are inside and out. We need to teach them that they are unique individuals and that they do not have to be like everyone else. I thought I had given my daughter a good foundation but I obviously have my work cut out. Think about it with your own kids before its too late. If I had my way, I would confront every single one of these mean girls and their parents! I am so tempted to email this mom who's child is spreading nonsense on the playground! But I have to take the high road. I have to set an example for my child, no matter how hard it is. I have to teach her to keep her head up and remain strong. Parents/Friends--remember this!!! I have always thought of my kid as confident, independent and strong willed. Maybe she was having an off day today, but regardless, it's not preschool anymore. It's the REAL WORLD, and unfortunately for our kids, the world isn't getting better.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
A Life Gone
I lost a friend on Sunday at the San Jose Rock and Roll Half Marathon. Rose was 34 years old and leaves behind a husband and two children (6 years & 2 years). Mid-run she collapsed and died instantly.
Rose was a kind and beautiful person, inside and out. For the past 3 weeks, we have been anxiously awaiting the race. In fact, she was the reason why I decided to run this particular race. (I prefer more destination areas and San Jose, well...) She approached me 3 weeks ago to run and make a girls weekend out of it. I decided to run and brought the family instead. She also added that I had "huge thunder thighs." I didn't take this comment lightly, but as you can see, we were a match made in heaven personality wise!
Every weekday morning, we would meet at the front gate outside the school. She always had a bright smile and wore a long purple suede coat. (Sorry, Rose, but I hated that coat!) She always wanted to get together for breakfast, kids play date, hang out, etc. but I always declined due to scheduling and my own training. I always had an excuse as to why I couldn't hang out. (Basically, I didn't take the time.) I did mention she should start preparing herself for the race. I was concerned that she wasn't prepared. Although she had ran a marathon years ago, weekly running was not a part of her regular routine. Nonetheless, she looked to be in good shape, slim and definitely took care of herself.
When I crossed that finish line, never did I imagine or even think to consider that something so tragic could/would happen to my friend. In fact, I was so consumed with "Runners High" afterwards that I didn't think about anyone/anything except meeting my family and contacting my coach. When I returned to the hotel room, I saw that Rose had called me at 7:52am and left a voice mail. She then sent me a text message at 7:56:19 that read: GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN, CALL OR TEXT ME WHEN YOU ARE DONE. I sent her a text message at 10:22am asking HOW DID YOU DO? only I never heard back. She was already gone yet I did not know.
Monday morning I wait for Rose at our regular meeting spot but she does not come. I figure she's late and go about my day. At about 5:00pm that evening, I receive an email saying that she had passed away at the race. I was in compete shock I gasped for air. My kids were really nervous, asking questions-Mommy, what's wrong? Are you okay? What happened? I tried to pretend that everything was okay. I immediately went to my computer to check for the news. I was in denial. I called Rose and left a message for her, my voice cracking. I sent her a text message and another email. There had to be some mistake. I turned on the local news and then her story popped up. I cried. Rose was gone.
Today, 2 days after her passing, my cell phone rings and rings. I run to answer it and my heart races. The caller ID says Rose. I think...oh my god, she's alive. I answer the phone. Hello? Hello? Rose! Silence....I start to freak out....am I receiving a call from a dead person? I shout Rose! Rose! All of a sudden, a voice that sounds like hers but isn't speaks. It's her mom. The most difficult conversation I have ever had was this one. Speaking with someone who just lost their child....its horrific. Rose was too young to die! I tried to comfort her mom in the best way I knew how. We cried together. I told her how often (daily) Rose spoke of her family and how much she missed them. I can't imagine what it is like for a parent to have to bury their own child and I hope to never experience this. It was an extremely painful yet wonderful conversation because I reminded her of how special her daughter, Rose was. And just like my friendship with Rose, we immediately bonded and that in itself gave her the comfort I think she needed at that moment. I was able to share with her Rose's last voicemail/text conversation and the optimism and excitement that Rose had up to the very last minute. The grief and guilt parents carry for their own naturally is just so overwhelming and ....I don't even have the words right now. I assured her mom that Rose was happy and enjoyed living life up to her very last breath. She wanted to run this race and not because she was competitive but simply just for fun. Rose=Fun.
I never heard a siren or saw an ambulance. I don't even know where or what mile she collapsed. In fact, I didn't even know that she was gone and that's what makes it all the more shocking. How could we be at the same event and yet I hear nothing? It took more than 24 hours before I had found out. I was her last phone call. I wonder, was that her final good bye? I mean really, who call's to wish their friend GOOD LUCK right before start time?! Rose did. That's just the kind of wonderful, thoughtful person she is.
You never know when your life will be gone or when your life's mission is over. Enjoy life like Rose--to the fullest so that way, when its time to go, you're doing something you enjoy. The timing will never be perfect for anyone but that's just how life is.
Rose was a kind and beautiful person, inside and out. For the past 3 weeks, we have been anxiously awaiting the race. In fact, she was the reason why I decided to run this particular race. (I prefer more destination areas and San Jose, well...) She approached me 3 weeks ago to run and make a girls weekend out of it. I decided to run and brought the family instead. She also added that I had "huge thunder thighs." I didn't take this comment lightly, but as you can see, we were a match made in heaven personality wise!
Every weekday morning, we would meet at the front gate outside the school. She always had a bright smile and wore a long purple suede coat. (Sorry, Rose, but I hated that coat!) She always wanted to get together for breakfast, kids play date, hang out, etc. but I always declined due to scheduling and my own training. I always had an excuse as to why I couldn't hang out. (Basically, I didn't take the time.) I did mention she should start preparing herself for the race. I was concerned that she wasn't prepared. Although she had ran a marathon years ago, weekly running was not a part of her regular routine. Nonetheless, she looked to be in good shape, slim and definitely took care of herself.
When I crossed that finish line, never did I imagine or even think to consider that something so tragic could/would happen to my friend. In fact, I was so consumed with "Runners High" afterwards that I didn't think about anyone/anything except meeting my family and contacting my coach. When I returned to the hotel room, I saw that Rose had called me at 7:52am and left a voice mail. She then sent me a text message at 7:56:19 that read: GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN, CALL OR TEXT ME WHEN YOU ARE DONE. I sent her a text message at 10:22am asking HOW DID YOU DO? only I never heard back. She was already gone yet I did not know.
Monday morning I wait for Rose at our regular meeting spot but she does not come. I figure she's late and go about my day. At about 5:00pm that evening, I receive an email saying that she had passed away at the race. I was in compete shock I gasped for air. My kids were really nervous, asking questions-Mommy, what's wrong? Are you okay? What happened? I tried to pretend that everything was okay. I immediately went to my computer to check for the news. I was in denial. I called Rose and left a message for her, my voice cracking. I sent her a text message and another email. There had to be some mistake. I turned on the local news and then her story popped up. I cried. Rose was gone.
Today, 2 days after her passing, my cell phone rings and rings. I run to answer it and my heart races. The caller ID says Rose. I think...oh my god, she's alive. I answer the phone. Hello? Hello? Rose! Silence....I start to freak out....am I receiving a call from a dead person? I shout Rose! Rose! All of a sudden, a voice that sounds like hers but isn't speaks. It's her mom. The most difficult conversation I have ever had was this one. Speaking with someone who just lost their child....its horrific. Rose was too young to die! I tried to comfort her mom in the best way I knew how. We cried together. I told her how often (daily) Rose spoke of her family and how much she missed them. I can't imagine what it is like for a parent to have to bury their own child and I hope to never experience this. It was an extremely painful yet wonderful conversation because I reminded her of how special her daughter, Rose was. And just like my friendship with Rose, we immediately bonded and that in itself gave her the comfort I think she needed at that moment. I was able to share with her Rose's last voicemail/text conversation and the optimism and excitement that Rose had up to the very last minute. The grief and guilt parents carry for their own naturally is just so overwhelming and ....I don't even have the words right now. I assured her mom that Rose was happy and enjoyed living life up to her very last breath. She wanted to run this race and not because she was competitive but simply just for fun. Rose=Fun.
I never heard a siren or saw an ambulance. I don't even know where or what mile she collapsed. In fact, I didn't even know that she was gone and that's what makes it all the more shocking. How could we be at the same event and yet I hear nothing? It took more than 24 hours before I had found out. I was her last phone call. I wonder, was that her final good bye? I mean really, who call's to wish their friend GOOD LUCK right before start time?! Rose did. That's just the kind of wonderful, thoughtful person she is.
You never know when your life will be gone or when your life's mission is over. Enjoy life like Rose--to the fullest so that way, when its time to go, you're doing something you enjoy. The timing will never be perfect for anyone but that's just how life is.
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