2009 was spectacular and am sorry to see it end! For starters, I ran my first half marathon in the beginning of the year and end 2009 with 3 half marathons, a few 10ks and a full marathon under my belt! The transition from preschool to kindergarten went extremely well for my oldest (too well) oh, and did I mention she taught herself how to ride a bike??!! My little "Snuggle Bunny" hand-picked her new school and now never wants to leave!! And to top it off, we were fortunate to have our "breadwinner" of the family secure a new and exciting job during the worst economic meltdown on Wall Street. Through it all, the Larson Family remained together and strong. We've had our ups and down, but we somehow always manage to survive....
Most importantly, 2009 was a year where I reconnected with old friends and made many new friends. For the past 5 years, I have really forgotten what its like to have friends and their importance because I focused all of my energy on just my kids. This year, I really made time to BE a friend. Through the good times and bad, my friends have really been a good support system outside of family and its nice to know that so many people really do care. I have an eclectic group of friends, all so different in so many ways, but all are really, really good friends and I am grateful to all of you for your friendship. Thank you Face book!
So what's in store for 2010? We just put the "elf" back in his box until he wakes up again in 11 months! (Thank God because he was really beginning to scare me.) Well, I just told my other half that I wouldn't be a fashion Queen this year.....(yeah right!) I said that I didn't need stylish clothing for cycling. (Really, I said that? Remember, I do race in a running skirt!) I am going to focus on being a good athlete. No, this IS NOT a New Year's Resolution--that, I definitely could not/would not keep and with SATC 2 coming out, well......its wishful thinking! I have 2 triathlons already lined up, a half marathon in 4 weeks and another marathon in 8 weeks so I have a lot on my plate to keep me focused and out of the stores! And besides, its not like I can swim in Christian Loubatins and do I really need another pair of skinny jeans! My oldest also asked if she could "race with mommy" so that's on our plate as well. As she put it, "I run really, really fast mommy. Everyone better move out of the way!" We joined a new swim club so it looks like this summer will be less Marin and more Redwood Shores (Hello Suburbia--think Desperate Housewives). Did I mention swim team? I've got the entire family swimming now, including the hubby. Serious swimmers in this family! And as fall approaches, it'll be a relief that I won't have to apply for kindergarten for the little one since big sister already paved the way-hallelujah! (OMG-my little one almost in kindergarten??) Halloween carnival again?! (Are you nuts??!!) And of course-lots and lots of time with friends, friends, and more friends! Oh, and did I mention that I am turing 36 years this year!
May 2010 be just as spectacular for all of you as 2009 was for me!
A day in the life of a new Kindergarten Mom. With two little ones going to school, this SF Mom discovers that it's not all play. The adventure begins at the sound of a bell-literally! Step in this mom's shoes as she walks, run, eats, and kills to be the Super Mom and Wife that she was born to be.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
My First Marathon Experience
I completed my first marathon yesterday, December 6, 2009. It was by far the most physically challenging activity I have ever completed. I decided to run a marathon almost a year ago. After completing my first half marathon on Super Bowl Sunday, I decided to go for it and registered immediately for CIM (California International Marathon).
My training officially began in September when I hired a running coach, followed a strict schedule, and made trips to the track. Aside from my regular runs, Tuesdays were strength training, Saturdays were typically long runs, and Mondays were my favorite--recovery days. As the months went by, my weekly mileage increased. In addition, I ran a half marathon in October-where my time improved by almost 10 minutes, and a 30k in November where I did very well and even made the top 10 in my age group. I completed every workout with the exception of 2 weeks ago when I ran too much (not following schedule) and my body was extremely fatigued. I went into CIM marathon feeling very confident and strong.
The night before the marathon I dropped off the kiddos with the grandparents and enjoyed a nice meal with the husband at Zelda's-a true Chicago Style Pizzeria. In typical race fashion for myself, had a horrible nights sleep. After tossing and turning, I finally fall asleep only to be woken up at 4:30am for my wake-up call. I already had my clothing lined up ready to put on. Made my way to the lobby where there were hundreds of marathoners. Had a bowl of oatmeal (my usual boring breakfast) and went to board the bus to take us to the starting line. It was pitch black outside and freezing-27 degrees. The excitement and urgency with the crowd was red hot! Everyone was pumped and wanted to get running! On the bus, I heard tales of previous marathons and Boston......
6:45am-Announcer starts talking on the microphone. Mayor of Sacramento welcomes all "runners" and congratulates us for just being there. Only 10% of the human population actually participates in a marathon. I was excited now!! Wow...I was one of the 10%! Next, they called all handicap/wheelchair to the front and announced that after they started, the race would begin 7 seconds after. I lined up at the 3:45 pace--much slower than I usually run but perfect pace for me to finish strong and in good time.
7:00am-Gun goes off and I start. People are passing me left and right but I don't worry. Their adrenaline is running and I knew the excitement was getting the best of them. I decided to save my energy and focused on a good pace. My first split-9:01. My second-8:35 and I kept that pace up until mile 19. Did I mention how cold it was? I was wearing a thick jacket (husband thought I would have to carry it the entire way) thick gloves, fleece hat and ear warmers, long pants, etc. It was so cold, actually freezing. My body was perspiring however, I could never get warm. Just impossible.
Mile 19.........After I passed mile 19, my right knee started to really hurt. The cold weather wasn't helping the arthritis in the knee and it really started to throb but I continued to carry on. However, my shoe lace came untied and I knew that if I stopped, it was over. But with the knee and the shoelace together, I, well......my mind started to mentally break down. Next thing I know, I literally came to a complete STOP. I sat down and tie my shoe. YES-I sat down. Then I just start crying. I am crying hard. I knew it was OVER. I tried to talk myself into moving but I couldn't. I just cried. Then I was walking. Sort of limping my way--more like feeling sorry for myself. Then I started to look around to see if there was any car that I could jump into to bring me to the finish line. But then I thought-I can't let me kids see me fail. So, I started to run again. But by mile 20, I was at 2:58. That left me with 47 minutes to run the last 6.2 miles. Under normal circumstances, I should have been able to run the last 6 miles in 47 minutes. But these weren't normal circumstances. My body/mind had checked out the minute I sat down to tie the show. I started to panic and cried even harder. My knee was too sore to run or at least that's what I told myself. That was my excuse. Mentally I was a goner. I rcontinues to run /skip/walk and and as each mile approached, my split times were getting worse and worse. I see the pace sette3:45 pass me at mile 20. Okay--not too bad. I was ahead of myself. I can keep up with this group. NOT. Next thing I know, pace setter 3:50, then 3:55.....I reached mile 24-3:38. The dream is officially OVER when I hear this time. The guy next to me says, "at least it will be under 4 hours!" That made it even worse! As I passed mile 25, I won't even tell you what my split was at that point, I was so gone, so removed and for the first time, I hated running. It seemed like an eternity to the finish line. I just wanted to quit but didn't want to disappoint the family (who btw-missed me!!) As I am running the last of the strip on J street, or whatever it was called, I kept asking myself where the heck was the State Capital/Finish line? It was so far, so long, so miserable and I just cried, cried, cried. I crossed the finish line still crying!
I didn't even want to take the medal that they put around my neck at the finish line. Usually, I like to absorb it all, the race, the people, the energy. But after this run, I collapsed on the grass and continued to cry. A few people asked me to take their pictures, not even noticing that I was crying or if they did, they didn't care and weren't going to allow me to spoil it for them. (I don't blame them!) I walked around one time and made my way back to my hotel room. I was so disappointed in myself. Physically-I cannot express how ready I was for this. When I hit mile 19, mile 20-I wasn't tired! My pace was consistent! But me knee, it was killing me and I just got emotionally and mentally distracted. Furthermore, its exactly like my coach said-I focused too much on chasing the golden ticket and not focusing on my passion for running. Truth be told-I didn't enjoy the running at all. And the last six miles were truly miserable. This was the first race that I did not enjoy. It was also the first race that I focused so much on time rather than just enjoying the run.
My final time was 4:00. Not a qualifying time for Boston. Will I do another marathon? Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely.
My training officially began in September when I hired a running coach, followed a strict schedule, and made trips to the track. Aside from my regular runs, Tuesdays were strength training, Saturdays were typically long runs, and Mondays were my favorite--recovery days. As the months went by, my weekly mileage increased. In addition, I ran a half marathon in October-where my time improved by almost 10 minutes, and a 30k in November where I did very well and even made the top 10 in my age group. I completed every workout with the exception of 2 weeks ago when I ran too much (not following schedule) and my body was extremely fatigued. I went into CIM marathon feeling very confident and strong.
The night before the marathon I dropped off the kiddos with the grandparents and enjoyed a nice meal with the husband at Zelda's-a true Chicago Style Pizzeria. In typical race fashion for myself, had a horrible nights sleep. After tossing and turning, I finally fall asleep only to be woken up at 4:30am for my wake-up call. I already had my clothing lined up ready to put on. Made my way to the lobby where there were hundreds of marathoners. Had a bowl of oatmeal (my usual boring breakfast) and went to board the bus to take us to the starting line. It was pitch black outside and freezing-27 degrees. The excitement and urgency with the crowd was red hot! Everyone was pumped and wanted to get running! On the bus, I heard tales of previous marathons and Boston......
6:45am-Announcer starts talking on the microphone. Mayor of Sacramento welcomes all "runners" and congratulates us for just being there. Only 10% of the human population actually participates in a marathon. I was excited now!! Wow...I was one of the 10%! Next, they called all handicap/wheelchair to the front and announced that after they started, the race would begin 7 seconds after. I lined up at the 3:45 pace--much slower than I usually run but perfect pace for me to finish strong and in good time.
7:00am-Gun goes off and I start. People are passing me left and right but I don't worry. Their adrenaline is running and I knew the excitement was getting the best of them. I decided to save my energy and focused on a good pace. My first split-9:01. My second-8:35 and I kept that pace up until mile 19. Did I mention how cold it was? I was wearing a thick jacket (husband thought I would have to carry it the entire way) thick gloves, fleece hat and ear warmers, long pants, etc. It was so cold, actually freezing. My body was perspiring however, I could never get warm. Just impossible.
Mile 19.........After I passed mile 19, my right knee started to really hurt. The cold weather wasn't helping the arthritis in the knee and it really started to throb but I continued to carry on. However, my shoe lace came untied and I knew that if I stopped, it was over. But with the knee and the shoelace together, I, well......my mind started to mentally break down. Next thing I know, I literally came to a complete STOP. I sat down and tie my shoe. YES-I sat down. Then I just start crying. I am crying hard. I knew it was OVER. I tried to talk myself into moving but I couldn't. I just cried. Then I was walking. Sort of limping my way--more like feeling sorry for myself. Then I started to look around to see if there was any car that I could jump into to bring me to the finish line. But then I thought-I can't let me kids see me fail. So, I started to run again. But by mile 20, I was at 2:58. That left me with 47 minutes to run the last 6.2 miles. Under normal circumstances, I should have been able to run the last 6 miles in 47 minutes. But these weren't normal circumstances. My body/mind had checked out the minute I sat down to tie the show. I started to panic and cried even harder. My knee was too sore to run or at least that's what I told myself. That was my excuse. Mentally I was a goner. I rcontinues to run /skip/walk and and as each mile approached, my split times were getting worse and worse. I see the pace sette3:45 pass me at mile 20. Okay--not too bad. I was ahead of myself. I can keep up with this group. NOT. Next thing I know, pace setter 3:50, then 3:55.....I reached mile 24-3:38. The dream is officially OVER when I hear this time. The guy next to me says, "at least it will be under 4 hours!" That made it even worse! As I passed mile 25, I won't even tell you what my split was at that point, I was so gone, so removed and for the first time, I hated running. It seemed like an eternity to the finish line. I just wanted to quit but didn't want to disappoint the family (who btw-missed me!!) As I am running the last of the strip on J street, or whatever it was called, I kept asking myself where the heck was the State Capital/Finish line? It was so far, so long, so miserable and I just cried, cried, cried. I crossed the finish line still crying!
I didn't even want to take the medal that they put around my neck at the finish line. Usually, I like to absorb it all, the race, the people, the energy. But after this run, I collapsed on the grass and continued to cry. A few people asked me to take their pictures, not even noticing that I was crying or if they did, they didn't care and weren't going to allow me to spoil it for them. (I don't blame them!) I walked around one time and made my way back to my hotel room. I was so disappointed in myself. Physically-I cannot express how ready I was for this. When I hit mile 19, mile 20-I wasn't tired! My pace was consistent! But me knee, it was killing me and I just got emotionally and mentally distracted. Furthermore, its exactly like my coach said-I focused too much on chasing the golden ticket and not focusing on my passion for running. Truth be told-I didn't enjoy the running at all. And the last six miles were truly miserable. This was the first race that I did not enjoy. It was also the first race that I focused so much on time rather than just enjoying the run.
My final time was 4:00. Not a qualifying time for Boston. Will I do another marathon? Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
For the Love of It
Okay...countdown is here. 5 days until my first marathon. 26.2 wonderful, glorious miles of running in downtown Sacramento, California. The State Capital for crying out loud!! Just one year ago, I ran my first 10k and have had the running bug ever since. The first race was the most difficult by far. Having only ran at most 3 miles, I decide to go for a whopping 6. I got 2 girlfriends to do it with me and I was excited. I ran well and hard that is..... until mile 5 when my body literally went into shut-down mode. I got the chills, cramps, hyperventilating and all of the above. I was just about to give up but my best Friend Jenn would not let me. "We just got to get over this last hill and we're there" I can still hear her like it was yesterday. And just like that, we ran up the last bit of Fort Mason and had a fast descend to the finish line. And just like a fairytale ending, we were the only 2 who crossed at that moment and they announced our names and the crowd cheered! The kids were there to capture mommy's first moment into what would lead to a great year and introduction to A Runner's World.
Since then, I have ran a race almost every month. There was the Chinese New Year Race where I was completely drenched from the rain, Kaiser Permanente Half Marathon--my first half and the loneliest, longest race ever (or so it seemed), SF Half Marathon where the sun was shining and ran through the different neighborhoods in SF, SJ Rock-n-Roll where I ran in speedy time even with a bathroom break yet lost a dear friend, and just a few weeks ago, the Clarksburg30k-a true test of my running ability through Sacramento's Wine Country (yes, the actually have vineyards in Sacramento)...and now this CIM (California International Marathon).
To even begin to express how I feel at this very moment is just utter disbelief. I never thought I could run 6 miles let alone 26! I have poured my heart and soul into this for the last 4 months, making sacrifices I never dreamed of making. Strength training sessions with my coach, long, intense track workouts, a diligent schedule, cross training, etc. If my daughter had to ask me to be first for pickup one more time (I am notoriously late due to running) If I couldn't run during the kids school time, I would go by mom's house for free baby sitting and use her street circle as my track. I didn't miss a single run. Breakfast with friends-nope. Had to run. Late night out? Nope. Had to run. Vacation? Yes, I even managed to run on vacation! Its been for one thing and one thing only-I have had my eye on the big prize--The Boston Marathon. January 28, 2009, Super Bowl Sunday, after just running my first half marathon, my friend's dad shared with me his glory days as a runner and what it meant and felt like to run the Boston Marathon. (I have to admit, I didn't even know what it was) The sparkle in his eyes, the excitement of his voice and the bounce in his feet just when he spoke those words "BOSTON MARATHON." I wanted that. I wanted that feeling, the sparkle, the excitement, the bragging rights to say, "I ran the Boston Marathon." And there was no stopping me. That conversation changed what running meant to me forever.
Well, now that moment is here. The moment I have been waiting for. 5 more days. But guess what? Now, I'm scared. I'm afraid that I won't make it. I'm afraid that I can't do it. Then what? I have told everyone that if they don't hear from me on Sunday, its because I'm crying. I will cry for a very long, long time. I want this so bad, more than anything. I have worked my tail off for this. But that might just be my problem. Perhaps I am focusing to much mental energy on chasing the golden ticket and not focusing on my passion for running! My coach Nate reminded me that I need to go into this race without the pressures I'm putting on myself. He then asked me why I was running. Of course I replied, "Boston." But really, I am running the marathon because I love running! I love the feeling after a run, that runner's high, that sense of accomplishment after a race, that "I want to throw up feeling" when I cross the finish line! It all feels sooo good. I never thought in a million years that I would say it but...I will run another marathon and I haven't even ran this one yet! I gotta feeling guys. No matter what happens Sunday, good or bad, it's gonna be a good day for Michelle Larson.
I am already thinking about the next race, the next goal. Triathlons are for 2010. But like Nate says, "we'll talk races next week. Let's focus on this little one this weekend.";)Gotta love Nate. Without him, I wouldn't be here!
Did I say, I love running?!
Since then, I have ran a race almost every month. There was the Chinese New Year Race where I was completely drenched from the rain, Kaiser Permanente Half Marathon--my first half and the loneliest, longest race ever (or so it seemed), SF Half Marathon where the sun was shining and ran through the different neighborhoods in SF, SJ Rock-n-Roll where I ran in speedy time even with a bathroom break yet lost a dear friend, and just a few weeks ago, the Clarksburg30k-a true test of my running ability through Sacramento's Wine Country (yes, the actually have vineyards in Sacramento)...and now this CIM (California International Marathon).
To even begin to express how I feel at this very moment is just utter disbelief. I never thought I could run 6 miles let alone 26! I have poured my heart and soul into this for the last 4 months, making sacrifices I never dreamed of making. Strength training sessions with my coach, long, intense track workouts, a diligent schedule, cross training, etc. If my daughter had to ask me to be first for pickup one more time (I am notoriously late due to running) If I couldn't run during the kids school time, I would go by mom's house for free baby sitting and use her street circle as my track. I didn't miss a single run. Breakfast with friends-nope. Had to run. Late night out? Nope. Had to run. Vacation? Yes, I even managed to run on vacation! Its been for one thing and one thing only-I have had my eye on the big prize--The Boston Marathon. January 28, 2009, Super Bowl Sunday, after just running my first half marathon, my friend's dad shared with me his glory days as a runner and what it meant and felt like to run the Boston Marathon. (I have to admit, I didn't even know what it was) The sparkle in his eyes, the excitement of his voice and the bounce in his feet just when he spoke those words "BOSTON MARATHON." I wanted that. I wanted that feeling, the sparkle, the excitement, the bragging rights to say, "I ran the Boston Marathon." And there was no stopping me. That conversation changed what running meant to me forever.
Well, now that moment is here. The moment I have been waiting for. 5 more days. But guess what? Now, I'm scared. I'm afraid that I won't make it. I'm afraid that I can't do it. Then what? I have told everyone that if they don't hear from me on Sunday, its because I'm crying. I will cry for a very long, long time. I want this so bad, more than anything. I have worked my tail off for this. But that might just be my problem. Perhaps I am focusing to much mental energy on chasing the golden ticket and not focusing on my passion for running! My coach Nate reminded me that I need to go into this race without the pressures I'm putting on myself. He then asked me why I was running. Of course I replied, "Boston." But really, I am running the marathon because I love running! I love the feeling after a run, that runner's high, that sense of accomplishment after a race, that "I want to throw up feeling" when I cross the finish line! It all feels sooo good. I never thought in a million years that I would say it but...I will run another marathon and I haven't even ran this one yet! I gotta feeling guys. No matter what happens Sunday, good or bad, it's gonna be a good day for Michelle Larson.
I am already thinking about the next race, the next goal. Triathlons are for 2010. But like Nate says, "we'll talk races next week. Let's focus on this little one this weekend.";)Gotta love Nate. Without him, I wouldn't be here!
Did I say, I love running?!
Monday, November 30, 2009
Keeping up with the Spouses
Six years ago, not a day went by when I didn't wear high heels, makeup and had the hair all done up. Now, most days, I hide my hair inside a beanie (okay-I hate my color right now) but still, I rarely make any attempt in fixing myself up. Truth of the matter is, I can take an hour out of the day to look good and have screaming kids or walk out the door sans makeup, and spend quality, happy times at the park or elsewhere. You decide. Being a city mom means designer jeans, cute tops, and the occasional ballet flat or sneakers. Oh, not to mention the designer sunglasses of choice. (I prefer cheap RayBan's or my go-to pair of Pradas which are 5 years old) Doesn't seem like a lot work, right? But then baby #2 came, and I just got sloppy, rarely seen without the sweatpants and ugly Uggs. The hair was always tied up in a greasy bun or hat, but my kids were HAPPY!
Today with both kids at school at least for part of the morning, I have more time to work on my appearance. Most days, I start off looking rough---smelly running clothes, bandanna around the head and no makeup. It's actually quite frightening. But after a nice shower, a blow-dry and some tinted sunscreen, a transformation is in the works. I'm starting to be my old-self again, except I am my old-self plus 6 years and a mom. Recently, my other half has questioned my "attire." My style is exactly the same as it once was but I kind of let myself go during the nursing/sticky finger stage. Now, I am wearing my stylish clothing yet he thinks I am generating attention!? It's not like I am one of those moms who bends over flashing her rack or thong?!! (You know who you are and you know when you are doing this. It's gross.) Truth be told, there was once upon a time in my life when being HOT was important. Now, its more of an after thought and being hot at 35yrs is just not the same as being hot at 25yrs! In fact, I don't want to be hot now! I'm a mom and the last think I want is for a man to approach me, stare, gawk, etc. in front of my kids--something my other half doesn't quite understand. See, men don't get it. That kind of attention is not the least bit flattering. Men don't understand that we women will love them fat, bald, and old. We accept the aging process, the grey hairs, the disappearing six pack and the man boobs. Men are not as kind or understanding that gravity isn't as kind to our bodies, especially after kids. After gaining 40lbs for a baby, the weight just doesn't disappear. We have to work at it, boot camps, a nip tuck here and there, an injectable filler to make the fine lines gone and bi-weekly waxing appointments. I mean really, how many guys out there work this hard to look good for their spouse? Not many.
A few months ago, my better half made a comment that my arms were "soft." Excuse me? I was running 6 days a week. How could I be soft? I took the extreme approach and bought my first set of weights. I worked out my upper body like a mad woman, investing in more weights and workout videos. Changed my diet (to help my running) and got pretty cut by mid-summer...almost too cut. My mom said my arms looked like a man! You get my point. How many times have I told him I think he needs to work out? Has he changed? NOPE. I can't even tell him I think he needs to lose weight without "hurting his feelings." (I recall being told in NYC that my butt was getting big and I immediately went on a diet)
Why is it that aging for men is much "cooler" than aging for women? I see many old guys with young women on their arms or wives with "a lot" of work done to look good. But as men get older, they do let themselves go and its okay! Why are women still blond at 60 and men are totally grey if not white? Viagra for the old guy who can't get it up? What about something for women to take to make us forget that WE are sleeping with the old wrinkly guy who can't get it up?! You mean its not acceptable for a woman to find her man old and wrinkly? What about a magic pill to give women a much needed boost in all the right places? A Viagra for her boobies, her butt, or better yet...for her stomach after she comes to terms that her other half isn't getting any younger....only older...
So by August, my upper body was pretty defined. I was swimming 4 days a week along with running 6 days. So, I'm guessing the many hours I spent at the pool interested my hubby (ok ok-my kids swim pre-team)and he decided to join my club, and took on swimming as well and ....he's starting to tone up. It kinda became a mini-competition of who is the better swimmer. Since fall came, I started slacking, too cold, rainy--the pool is outside. Upper body muscles are gone. What do I get? Someone made a comment that I wasn't as "fit" as I was in the summer?! And him.....well, he now prances around the pool in his tight Speedos in all his glory!
Today with both kids at school at least for part of the morning, I have more time to work on my appearance. Most days, I start off looking rough---smelly running clothes, bandanna around the head and no makeup. It's actually quite frightening. But after a nice shower, a blow-dry and some tinted sunscreen, a transformation is in the works. I'm starting to be my old-self again, except I am my old-self plus 6 years and a mom. Recently, my other half has questioned my "attire." My style is exactly the same as it once was but I kind of let myself go during the nursing/sticky finger stage. Now, I am wearing my stylish clothing yet he thinks I am generating attention!? It's not like I am one of those moms who bends over flashing her rack or thong?!! (You know who you are and you know when you are doing this. It's gross.) Truth be told, there was once upon a time in my life when being HOT was important. Now, its more of an after thought and being hot at 35yrs is just not the same as being hot at 25yrs! In fact, I don't want to be hot now! I'm a mom and the last think I want is for a man to approach me, stare, gawk, etc. in front of my kids--something my other half doesn't quite understand. See, men don't get it. That kind of attention is not the least bit flattering. Men don't understand that we women will love them fat, bald, and old. We accept the aging process, the grey hairs, the disappearing six pack and the man boobs. Men are not as kind or understanding that gravity isn't as kind to our bodies, especially after kids. After gaining 40lbs for a baby, the weight just doesn't disappear. We have to work at it, boot camps, a nip tuck here and there, an injectable filler to make the fine lines gone and bi-weekly waxing appointments. I mean really, how many guys out there work this hard to look good for their spouse? Not many.
A few months ago, my better half made a comment that my arms were "soft." Excuse me? I was running 6 days a week. How could I be soft? I took the extreme approach and bought my first set of weights. I worked out my upper body like a mad woman, investing in more weights and workout videos. Changed my diet (to help my running) and got pretty cut by mid-summer...almost too cut. My mom said my arms looked like a man! You get my point. How many times have I told him I think he needs to work out? Has he changed? NOPE. I can't even tell him I think he needs to lose weight without "hurting his feelings." (I recall being told in NYC that my butt was getting big and I immediately went on a diet)
Why is it that aging for men is much "cooler" than aging for women? I see many old guys with young women on their arms or wives with "a lot" of work done to look good. But as men get older, they do let themselves go and its okay! Why are women still blond at 60 and men are totally grey if not white? Viagra for the old guy who can't get it up? What about something for women to take to make us forget that WE are sleeping with the old wrinkly guy who can't get it up?! You mean its not acceptable for a woman to find her man old and wrinkly? What about a magic pill to give women a much needed boost in all the right places? A Viagra for her boobies, her butt, or better yet...for her stomach after she comes to terms that her other half isn't getting any younger....only older...
So by August, my upper body was pretty defined. I was swimming 4 days a week along with running 6 days. So, I'm guessing the many hours I spent at the pool interested my hubby (ok ok-my kids swim pre-team)and he decided to join my club, and took on swimming as well and ....he's starting to tone up. It kinda became a mini-competition of who is the better swimmer. Since fall came, I started slacking, too cold, rainy--the pool is outside. Upper body muscles are gone. What do I get? Someone made a comment that I wasn't as "fit" as I was in the summer?! And him.....well, he now prances around the pool in his tight Speedos in all his glory!
Sunday, November 1, 2009
T.G.I.O
Thank God its OVAH!! Halloween has come and gone and so has my first BIG event with a fancy title. Chairing an event is a lot more work than I had ever imagined and quite frankly, I prefer being unknown. As I frantically searched for the perfect costume that would leave me incognito, I realized afterwards that my big wig was a dead giveaway at the carnival to anyone who wanted to find Michelle Larson. (I was dressed as Marie Antoinette) The good is that sans costume, I am completely unrecognizable to most. (Haters can't find me!!)
The Halloween carnival was six weeks in the making. From buying decorations to searching for fun prizes, food, snacks, donations, etc. it has been a long six weeks and really took its toll on my family. I don't think my kids wanted to go to another Halloween store even if I bribed them with candy! They were so over it.....And if anyone else had to listen to another one of my jingles or decor plans, they might just lose it!! Everyone at the party store now knows me by first name! The night before the carnival, we pulled an all-nighter, completely transforming the school into a Halloween paradise for both children and adults. And when I say an all-nighter, it was exactly that. It was strange to watch the darkness turn into morning and realize that I had been at my daughter's school all night and we weren't even close to being ready!! I was setting up the outside bar area at 7am. Fortunately for me, "we" was my team of "single guys" who were kind enough to give up their Friday and Saturday nites, come to my rescue, see my vision and help create the most spectacular scene ever! And all for the kids. Talk about good guys, good friends, and clearly, they loved my kid. What more could I ask for?!
The event was a huge success but I was left completely and totally exhausted/wiped out. By the time it was ovah, I had literally been UP for almost 48 hours straight! Everyone loved the event, enjoyed the food, kids played endlessly, parents participated in the costume contest and well....let's just say that all the haters out there were left to shame. Oh-and the Mad Scientist Lab was a HIT! I bet the parents who doubted my "electrical" powers asked themselves, "how the hell did she make light?" (Battery operated and extenstion cords through a window baby....) They really should've, could've had the haunted house up there! (Mean Girls Story) Oh, and the 2 most important things--didn't run out of food or alcohol! The new Kindergarten parent SURVIVED! Yes-I received many compliments but the one that really stuck was, "I can't believe you are a kindergarten parent!" WTF? I didn't get that one. I mean, what's my kid being in Kindergarten got to do with anything? It's not really about her, its more about the parent and what grade the child is in if that makes any sense. I am learning that grades do matter. I had a friend tell me the other day that they used to laugh at the kindergarten parents at her son's school because they were the only mom's dressed up at morning drop off! They were the newbies still trying to impress. Clearly--I didn't get that memo because I drop off my kids in the roughest of rough, stinky and very disgusting running gear. No Lululemon Athletica here!! In fact, some days, I even show up for pickup directly after a workout! Talk about F-U-N-K-Y!
But back to what I was saying. Being a Kindergarten parent means many things: 1) you will sign up to help at any/all events. Example: We went to a school picnic and my plus one was walking around collecting garbage (AKA-being helpful) and someone made a comment to him that he must be a "Kindergarten Parent." 2) SUCKER (AKA-Michelle Larson taking on Halloween Carnival Chair) I took on this position so the event would not be cancelled. After accepting, I was informed that it would never be cancelled! 3) When all else fails and you need volunteers for anything-ask a Kindergarten Parent. The Newbies will 9 times out of 10 say YES! (Think how helpful you were your first year of preschool vs. your last) 4) Being a Kindergarten parent means that--You're not supposed to Chair a successful Halloween Carnival let alone make it the best event the school has ever had! Okay....I am NOT saying that the school community is out to lynch me so please, DO NOT THINK THIS!!! (It's a wonderful school community) I guess what I am trying to say is that as a Kindergarten Parent, you're the new kid on the block, the rookie, the newbie, the nobody, the person with the least amount of experience. As a Kindergarten parent, you are NOT supposed to Chair any event, let alone a big one. In my case, I took on the biggest event at the school. Biggest meaning that most everyone attends and it happens at the school with no hired help. Therefore every decision is left up to the Chair (me) and every mistake is MY fault. But that's just it-- there were NO mistakes! In fact, this event was like no other in the past. Completely new and every change this Kindergarten Parent made was for the best and it all worked out! (I got LUCKY) EVERYONE came and EVERYONE (kids, parents and grandparents too!!) had a GREAT time!! But again--the event was Chaired by a Kindergarten Parent!
So what's the point of this blog? Ummm....my kids are happy to have THEIR mom back, my plus one is happy to have HIS wife back, and I'm happy to have MY life back! Oh-and I repeat, I will NEVER, Not Ever Chair a Halloween Carnival event or any event ever again! And yes-a Kindergarten Parent CAN Chair a successful event so if you must give it a try, know that YOU CAN do it but once you do, you'll never want to do it ever again!!
And the Mean Girls DIDN'T live happily ever after.......at least not in my story....LMAO!!
The Halloween carnival was six weeks in the making. From buying decorations to searching for fun prizes, food, snacks, donations, etc. it has been a long six weeks and really took its toll on my family. I don't think my kids wanted to go to another Halloween store even if I bribed them with candy! They were so over it.....And if anyone else had to listen to another one of my jingles or decor plans, they might just lose it!! Everyone at the party store now knows me by first name! The night before the carnival, we pulled an all-nighter, completely transforming the school into a Halloween paradise for both children and adults. And when I say an all-nighter, it was exactly that. It was strange to watch the darkness turn into morning and realize that I had been at my daughter's school all night and we weren't even close to being ready!! I was setting up the outside bar area at 7am. Fortunately for me, "we" was my team of "single guys" who were kind enough to give up their Friday and Saturday nites, come to my rescue, see my vision and help create the most spectacular scene ever! And all for the kids. Talk about good guys, good friends, and clearly, they loved my kid. What more could I ask for?!
The event was a huge success but I was left completely and totally exhausted/wiped out. By the time it was ovah, I had literally been UP for almost 48 hours straight! Everyone loved the event, enjoyed the food, kids played endlessly, parents participated in the costume contest and well....let's just say that all the haters out there were left to shame. Oh-and the Mad Scientist Lab was a HIT! I bet the parents who doubted my "electrical" powers asked themselves, "how the hell did she make light?" (Battery operated and extenstion cords through a window baby....) They really should've, could've had the haunted house up there! (Mean Girls Story) Oh, and the 2 most important things--didn't run out of food or alcohol! The new Kindergarten parent SURVIVED! Yes-I received many compliments but the one that really stuck was, "I can't believe you are a kindergarten parent!" WTF? I didn't get that one. I mean, what's my kid being in Kindergarten got to do with anything? It's not really about her, its more about the parent and what grade the child is in if that makes any sense. I am learning that grades do matter. I had a friend tell me the other day that they used to laugh at the kindergarten parents at her son's school because they were the only mom's dressed up at morning drop off! They were the newbies still trying to impress. Clearly--I didn't get that memo because I drop off my kids in the roughest of rough, stinky and very disgusting running gear. No Lululemon Athletica here!! In fact, some days, I even show up for pickup directly after a workout! Talk about F-U-N-K-Y!
But back to what I was saying. Being a Kindergarten parent means many things: 1) you will sign up to help at any/all events. Example: We went to a school picnic and my plus one was walking around collecting garbage (AKA-being helpful) and someone made a comment to him that he must be a "Kindergarten Parent." 2) SUCKER (AKA-Michelle Larson taking on Halloween Carnival Chair) I took on this position so the event would not be cancelled. After accepting, I was informed that it would never be cancelled! 3) When all else fails and you need volunteers for anything-ask a Kindergarten Parent. The Newbies will 9 times out of 10 say YES! (Think how helpful you were your first year of preschool vs. your last) 4) Being a Kindergarten parent means that--You're not supposed to Chair a successful Halloween Carnival let alone make it the best event the school has ever had! Okay....I am NOT saying that the school community is out to lynch me so please, DO NOT THINK THIS!!! (It's a wonderful school community) I guess what I am trying to say is that as a Kindergarten Parent, you're the new kid on the block, the rookie, the newbie, the nobody, the person with the least amount of experience. As a Kindergarten parent, you are NOT supposed to Chair any event, let alone a big one. In my case, I took on the biggest event at the school. Biggest meaning that most everyone attends and it happens at the school with no hired help. Therefore every decision is left up to the Chair (me) and every mistake is MY fault. But that's just it-- there were NO mistakes! In fact, this event was like no other in the past. Completely new and every change this Kindergarten Parent made was for the best and it all worked out! (I got LUCKY) EVERYONE came and EVERYONE (kids, parents and grandparents too!!) had a GREAT time!! But again--the event was Chaired by a Kindergarten Parent!
So what's the point of this blog? Ummm....my kids are happy to have THEIR mom back, my plus one is happy to have HIS wife back, and I'm happy to have MY life back! Oh-and I repeat, I will NEVER, Not Ever Chair a Halloween Carnival event or any event ever again! And yes-a Kindergarten Parent CAN Chair a successful event so if you must give it a try, know that YOU CAN do it but once you do, you'll never want to do it ever again!!
And the Mean Girls DIDN'T live happily ever after.......at least not in my story....LMAO!!
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Michellerella
Michellerella plus one have been invited to the ball!! Okay.....not really. I mean yes, we were invited to the ball but we had to buy our tix. No biggie. School fundraiser and good cause. I go through my closet looking at dress after dress. There are easily 10 gorgeous dresses to wear that all come with an excuse as to why I can't wear them. Too sexy, wrong fabric, outdated, etc. Oh how I wish I had some mouse friends to "update" my not-so-current pretty dress! The last thing I want to do is buy another one-time-wear with a hefty price tag! What's a girl to do?
My so-called problem started a month ago when another mom mentioned that anyone who isn't wearing a floor-length gown looks "out of place." Okay.....I don't wear floor length gowns period. Or ever for that matter! Okay...my wedding was an exception but that dress wasn't typical wedding attire (thank you Ralph Lauren!)I guess I could wear this dress. It's floor length and drop-dead gorgeous and I would really get my monies worth out of it since I got to wear it a second time at the Black & White Ball. I mean seriously, who gets to wear their wedding dress twice? Third time's a charm, right? Nope. I've decided its too dressy, or just an excuse to buy something. You make the call.
I have my heart set on an amazing tuxedo-style dress. It's a halter wrap dress with a folded collar, single button closure and slight tail in the back. It would really show off the back and arms. Sexy yet very simple and sophisticated. Affordable price. I picture myself rocking this dress with Rihanna-esque hair (remember, I have the shorter do now)and booties. So what's the problem? I'm 5 feet tall and by the time I make all the necessary adjustments, I might as well have bought the floor-length gown that I don't want to spend the money on.
Okay.....so I go about my way again, trying to find the perfect dress. Or better yet, finding a dress that I will FOR SURE wear again sometime in the near future--date night, etc. I find a really inexpensive jersey dress that has the most A-M-A-Z-I-N-G back detail. Paired with my equally fabulous Barbara Bui heels and I think it could look like a million bucks. However, since the front of the dress is just your basic LBD, I decide to keep looking.
The key to finding this perfect dress is to also stick within my budget. I don't want to spend more than $500. Many of you are probably thinking I am crazy, but oh well. I don't go out that often, let alone formal affairs, so I refuse to spend a lot of money on a dress that will simply look beautiful in my closet and collect dust. Or perhaps some think I am spending too much? Either way, this makes the task that much more daunting....
OMG-I find the dress! Its simple. It's just slightly above the knee. It requires ZERO alterations. It was fate-the only dress of its kind and in MY SIZE! Folks-if I look "out of place" then so be it! I will be the most savviest of savvy chicks out there! Marc Jacobs comes to the rescue!! Let me rephrase-Marc by Marc Jacobs. Lower price point! One shoulder dress-VERY CURRENT and way under my budget! Put together with my faboosh heels and voila!
Michellerella plus one get to go to the ball! But unlike Cinderella, this girl gets to keep the dress and the prince past midnight!
My so-called problem started a month ago when another mom mentioned that anyone who isn't wearing a floor-length gown looks "out of place." Okay.....I don't wear floor length gowns period. Or ever for that matter! Okay...my wedding was an exception but that dress wasn't typical wedding attire (thank you Ralph Lauren!)I guess I could wear this dress. It's floor length and drop-dead gorgeous and I would really get my monies worth out of it since I got to wear it a second time at the Black & White Ball. I mean seriously, who gets to wear their wedding dress twice? Third time's a charm, right? Nope. I've decided its too dressy, or just an excuse to buy something. You make the call.
I have my heart set on an amazing tuxedo-style dress. It's a halter wrap dress with a folded collar, single button closure and slight tail in the back. It would really show off the back and arms. Sexy yet very simple and sophisticated. Affordable price. I picture myself rocking this dress with Rihanna-esque hair (remember, I have the shorter do now)and booties. So what's the problem? I'm 5 feet tall and by the time I make all the necessary adjustments, I might as well have bought the floor-length gown that I don't want to spend the money on.
Okay.....so I go about my way again, trying to find the perfect dress. Or better yet, finding a dress that I will FOR SURE wear again sometime in the near future--date night, etc. I find a really inexpensive jersey dress that has the most A-M-A-Z-I-N-G back detail. Paired with my equally fabulous Barbara Bui heels and I think it could look like a million bucks. However, since the front of the dress is just your basic LBD, I decide to keep looking.
The key to finding this perfect dress is to also stick within my budget. I don't want to spend more than $500. Many of you are probably thinking I am crazy, but oh well. I don't go out that often, let alone formal affairs, so I refuse to spend a lot of money on a dress that will simply look beautiful in my closet and collect dust. Or perhaps some think I am spending too much? Either way, this makes the task that much more daunting....
OMG-I find the dress! Its simple. It's just slightly above the knee. It requires ZERO alterations. It was fate-the only dress of its kind and in MY SIZE! Folks-if I look "out of place" then so be it! I will be the most savviest of savvy chicks out there! Marc Jacobs comes to the rescue!! Let me rephrase-Marc by Marc Jacobs. Lower price point! One shoulder dress-VERY CURRENT and way under my budget! Put together with my faboosh heels and voila!
Michellerella plus one get to go to the ball! But unlike Cinderella, this girl gets to keep the dress and the prince past midnight!
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Peer Pressure
As a parent, I am as over protective as they get. I am very selective as to whom I leave my kids with, when, and where. Even though my mom picks up my daughter from school twice a week, I still call her to remind her on those mornings. I have only left my kids 2x in their lives-and the first time was just last year. I don't have a regular babysitter, and aside from my parents, I don't trust anyone to care for my kids. Yes-they go to camps and activities, but I am speaking specifically about date nights, sleepovers, etc. I love my kids more than anything in this world. Probably even more than myself and my husband. I eat, sleep, breathe my kids. Healthy? Probably not, but I am getting better. Since I have taken up running, I actually get away and make time to run which means getting away.
I attend every single extra curricular activity, school function, and am very active in their schools. When I see a mean kid, I am on it. Pushing/shoving--on that too. Anyone being rude to my kid-on it. But now that my oldest has started kindergarten, I can't be on it like I used to. She is in an environment for most of the day without me, left to take care of herself. I can't protect her anymore. I have to hope that I have instilled in her good values about life and most importantly, confidence and a sense of security within herself.
Today, my daughter came home to tell me that a 3rd Grader had told her that a Kindergarten Parent was taking all the Halloween candy away from the school carnival. She then went on to ask if I was that mom. I immediately snapped, "What? Who told you that?" I was very upset. For starters, this is NOT true. But what really bothered me is that a 3rd grader said this to Lola (not knowing I was the Kindergarten parent or maybe she did?)
What really, really bothers me is that this 3rd Grader most likely got her information from her mother-who btw, emailed me begging for candy at the carnival after she spent a paragraph talking about how bad her daughter's hygiene is. WTF? Okay-first of all, what parent actually sits their kid down and says, "Honey. The Halloween carnival isn't going to have candy this year. Do you still want to go?" This parent emphasized to me via email how her daughter "'has really bad teeth, very thin enamel'" yet is not happy that I am providing a healthier school carnival format??!! Does this make any sense? I would think a parent would appreciate that a)someone is taking the time to consider healthy options for the students and b) that someone is making a conscious effort of promoting healthy eating. BUT NOOOOOOO. I get my face ripped off because there is no candy--and this part is simply not true! Yes-I have eliminated the sodas filled with high fructose syrup, no slushies, no cotton candy. But did I mention that we are having natural sodas (do the kids notice the difference) and caramel/candy apples? We have an entire edible science lab filled with candy delectables and a table designated for homemade baked sweets (Hilda's Horrible Treats!)? Okay, so I am not passing out Snickers Bars, but trust me, there is enough sugary things to go around and frankly, if my child had "really bad teeth" the last thing I would be complaining about is lack of candy for her to ingest. If anything, I would welcome a healthy change!
What I have learned in Chairing my first BIG event is that I WILL NEVER CHAIR ANY EVENT EVER AGAIN. Its impossible to please everyone and you can't help but to make enemies along the way. I thought I was doing a service to the school but instead I have had to deal with way too many egos. I know this happens at every school, with every event, etc. but call me naive, I just didn't think it would happen to me. I have put so much thought into this event, so much creativity and vision, but nobody cares. They would rather bitch about having a healthier menu than embracing it. Instead of being part of a new generation,or welcoming new ideas and new blood (no Halloween pun intended)or just simply being grateful that someone actually cares about the kids, its been grief, anxiety, and now its on the playground and has reached my kid. That's where I draw the line. Fuck with me all you want. Don't fuck with my kid. I will KILL for my kid. I don't care who you are or how old you are, but FUCK with my kid and you'll be sorry.
Today was her first test and I am sure there are more to come. I did not expect her to stick up for me, but a part of me wishes she had. My daughter's feelings were hurt and she's upset with me because she thinks I am ruining Halloween! How can this be? I am doing my best to make sure it's a fantastic event?? She knows exactly what is going to be at the carnival. Why didn't she speak up and tell this girl she was wrong?! Was she intimidated by this older girl? Probably. I have got to get through to her that she has a voice, an opinion and she can express that! Right or wrong-she can say something! She needs to speak her mind and not let these MEAN people get to her.
My daughter LOVES to get manicures. She was so excited to see Elsa (manicurist) this Saturday and have her nails painted a special way for Halloween (Black & Orange) She went to school and I guess some girls were telling her this and that about her nails. She came home and actually asked me to remove the polish! I refused and I told her not to listen to them. She went on and on that these girls said she couldn't paint her nails, etc. Not a teacher--KIDS. Most likely jealous kids who have now given my innocent child a complex about her painted fingernails. I caught her literally trying to peel away at the polish!
Peer pressure is something new for us as a family but something you all should think about. But unfortunately its a battle that we can't fight for our kids on the playground. As parents, we need to do our best to teach our children how wonderful they are inside and out. We need to teach them that they are unique individuals and that they do not have to be like everyone else. I thought I had given my daughter a good foundation but I obviously have my work cut out. Think about it with your own kids before its too late. If I had my way, I would confront every single one of these mean girls and their parents! I am so tempted to email this mom who's child is spreading nonsense on the playground! But I have to take the high road. I have to set an example for my child, no matter how hard it is. I have to teach her to keep her head up and remain strong. Parents/Friends--remember this!!! I have always thought of my kid as confident, independent and strong willed. Maybe she was having an off day today, but regardless, it's not preschool anymore. It's the REAL WORLD, and unfortunately for our kids, the world isn't getting better.
I attend every single extra curricular activity, school function, and am very active in their schools. When I see a mean kid, I am on it. Pushing/shoving--on that too. Anyone being rude to my kid-on it. But now that my oldest has started kindergarten, I can't be on it like I used to. She is in an environment for most of the day without me, left to take care of herself. I can't protect her anymore. I have to hope that I have instilled in her good values about life and most importantly, confidence and a sense of security within herself.
Today, my daughter came home to tell me that a 3rd Grader had told her that a Kindergarten Parent was taking all the Halloween candy away from the school carnival. She then went on to ask if I was that mom. I immediately snapped, "What? Who told you that?" I was very upset. For starters, this is NOT true. But what really bothered me is that a 3rd grader said this to Lola (not knowing I was the Kindergarten parent or maybe she did?)
What really, really bothers me is that this 3rd Grader most likely got her information from her mother-who btw, emailed me begging for candy at the carnival after she spent a paragraph talking about how bad her daughter's hygiene is. WTF? Okay-first of all, what parent actually sits their kid down and says, "Honey. The Halloween carnival isn't going to have candy this year. Do you still want to go?" This parent emphasized to me via email how her daughter "'has really bad teeth, very thin enamel'" yet is not happy that I am providing a healthier school carnival format??!! Does this make any sense? I would think a parent would appreciate that a)someone is taking the time to consider healthy options for the students and b) that someone is making a conscious effort of promoting healthy eating. BUT NOOOOOOO. I get my face ripped off because there is no candy--and this part is simply not true! Yes-I have eliminated the sodas filled with high fructose syrup, no slushies, no cotton candy. But did I mention that we are having natural sodas (do the kids notice the difference) and caramel/candy apples? We have an entire edible science lab filled with candy delectables and a table designated for homemade baked sweets (Hilda's Horrible Treats!)? Okay, so I am not passing out Snickers Bars, but trust me, there is enough sugary things to go around and frankly, if my child had "really bad teeth" the last thing I would be complaining about is lack of candy for her to ingest. If anything, I would welcome a healthy change!
What I have learned in Chairing my first BIG event is that I WILL NEVER CHAIR ANY EVENT EVER AGAIN. Its impossible to please everyone and you can't help but to make enemies along the way. I thought I was doing a service to the school but instead I have had to deal with way too many egos. I know this happens at every school, with every event, etc. but call me naive, I just didn't think it would happen to me. I have put so much thought into this event, so much creativity and vision, but nobody cares. They would rather bitch about having a healthier menu than embracing it. Instead of being part of a new generation,or welcoming new ideas and new blood (no Halloween pun intended)or just simply being grateful that someone actually cares about the kids, its been grief, anxiety, and now its on the playground and has reached my kid. That's where I draw the line. Fuck with me all you want. Don't fuck with my kid. I will KILL for my kid. I don't care who you are or how old you are, but FUCK with my kid and you'll be sorry.
Today was her first test and I am sure there are more to come. I did not expect her to stick up for me, but a part of me wishes she had. My daughter's feelings were hurt and she's upset with me because she thinks I am ruining Halloween! How can this be? I am doing my best to make sure it's a fantastic event?? She knows exactly what is going to be at the carnival. Why didn't she speak up and tell this girl she was wrong?! Was she intimidated by this older girl? Probably. I have got to get through to her that she has a voice, an opinion and she can express that! Right or wrong-she can say something! She needs to speak her mind and not let these MEAN people get to her.
My daughter LOVES to get manicures. She was so excited to see Elsa (manicurist) this Saturday and have her nails painted a special way for Halloween (Black & Orange) She went to school and I guess some girls were telling her this and that about her nails. She came home and actually asked me to remove the polish! I refused and I told her not to listen to them. She went on and on that these girls said she couldn't paint her nails, etc. Not a teacher--KIDS. Most likely jealous kids who have now given my innocent child a complex about her painted fingernails. I caught her literally trying to peel away at the polish!
Peer pressure is something new for us as a family but something you all should think about. But unfortunately its a battle that we can't fight for our kids on the playground. As parents, we need to do our best to teach our children how wonderful they are inside and out. We need to teach them that they are unique individuals and that they do not have to be like everyone else. I thought I had given my daughter a good foundation but I obviously have my work cut out. Think about it with your own kids before its too late. If I had my way, I would confront every single one of these mean girls and their parents! I am so tempted to email this mom who's child is spreading nonsense on the playground! But I have to take the high road. I have to set an example for my child, no matter how hard it is. I have to teach her to keep her head up and remain strong. Parents/Friends--remember this!!! I have always thought of my kid as confident, independent and strong willed. Maybe she was having an off day today, but regardless, it's not preschool anymore. It's the REAL WORLD, and unfortunately for our kids, the world isn't getting better.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
A Life Gone
I lost a friend on Sunday at the San Jose Rock and Roll Half Marathon. Rose was 34 years old and leaves behind a husband and two children (6 years & 2 years). Mid-run she collapsed and died instantly.
Rose was a kind and beautiful person, inside and out. For the past 3 weeks, we have been anxiously awaiting the race. In fact, she was the reason why I decided to run this particular race. (I prefer more destination areas and San Jose, well...) She approached me 3 weeks ago to run and make a girls weekend out of it. I decided to run and brought the family instead. She also added that I had "huge thunder thighs." I didn't take this comment lightly, but as you can see, we were a match made in heaven personality wise!
Every weekday morning, we would meet at the front gate outside the school. She always had a bright smile and wore a long purple suede coat. (Sorry, Rose, but I hated that coat!) She always wanted to get together for breakfast, kids play date, hang out, etc. but I always declined due to scheduling and my own training. I always had an excuse as to why I couldn't hang out. (Basically, I didn't take the time.) I did mention she should start preparing herself for the race. I was concerned that she wasn't prepared. Although she had ran a marathon years ago, weekly running was not a part of her regular routine. Nonetheless, she looked to be in good shape, slim and definitely took care of herself.
When I crossed that finish line, never did I imagine or even think to consider that something so tragic could/would happen to my friend. In fact, I was so consumed with "Runners High" afterwards that I didn't think about anyone/anything except meeting my family and contacting my coach. When I returned to the hotel room, I saw that Rose had called me at 7:52am and left a voice mail. She then sent me a text message at 7:56:19 that read: GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN, CALL OR TEXT ME WHEN YOU ARE DONE. I sent her a text message at 10:22am asking HOW DID YOU DO? only I never heard back. She was already gone yet I did not know.
Monday morning I wait for Rose at our regular meeting spot but she does not come. I figure she's late and go about my day. At about 5:00pm that evening, I receive an email saying that she had passed away at the race. I was in compete shock I gasped for air. My kids were really nervous, asking questions-Mommy, what's wrong? Are you okay? What happened? I tried to pretend that everything was okay. I immediately went to my computer to check for the news. I was in denial. I called Rose and left a message for her, my voice cracking. I sent her a text message and another email. There had to be some mistake. I turned on the local news and then her story popped up. I cried. Rose was gone.
Today, 2 days after her passing, my cell phone rings and rings. I run to answer it and my heart races. The caller ID says Rose. I think...oh my god, she's alive. I answer the phone. Hello? Hello? Rose! Silence....I start to freak out....am I receiving a call from a dead person? I shout Rose! Rose! All of a sudden, a voice that sounds like hers but isn't speaks. It's her mom. The most difficult conversation I have ever had was this one. Speaking with someone who just lost their child....its horrific. Rose was too young to die! I tried to comfort her mom in the best way I knew how. We cried together. I told her how often (daily) Rose spoke of her family and how much she missed them. I can't imagine what it is like for a parent to have to bury their own child and I hope to never experience this. It was an extremely painful yet wonderful conversation because I reminded her of how special her daughter, Rose was. And just like my friendship with Rose, we immediately bonded and that in itself gave her the comfort I think she needed at that moment. I was able to share with her Rose's last voicemail/text conversation and the optimism and excitement that Rose had up to the very last minute. The grief and guilt parents carry for their own naturally is just so overwhelming and ....I don't even have the words right now. I assured her mom that Rose was happy and enjoyed living life up to her very last breath. She wanted to run this race and not because she was competitive but simply just for fun. Rose=Fun.
I never heard a siren or saw an ambulance. I don't even know where or what mile she collapsed. In fact, I didn't even know that she was gone and that's what makes it all the more shocking. How could we be at the same event and yet I hear nothing? It took more than 24 hours before I had found out. I was her last phone call. I wonder, was that her final good bye? I mean really, who call's to wish their friend GOOD LUCK right before start time?! Rose did. That's just the kind of wonderful, thoughtful person she is.
You never know when your life will be gone or when your life's mission is over. Enjoy life like Rose--to the fullest so that way, when its time to go, you're doing something you enjoy. The timing will never be perfect for anyone but that's just how life is.
Rose was a kind and beautiful person, inside and out. For the past 3 weeks, we have been anxiously awaiting the race. In fact, she was the reason why I decided to run this particular race. (I prefer more destination areas and San Jose, well...) She approached me 3 weeks ago to run and make a girls weekend out of it. I decided to run and brought the family instead. She also added that I had "huge thunder thighs." I didn't take this comment lightly, but as you can see, we were a match made in heaven personality wise!
Every weekday morning, we would meet at the front gate outside the school. She always had a bright smile and wore a long purple suede coat. (Sorry, Rose, but I hated that coat!) She always wanted to get together for breakfast, kids play date, hang out, etc. but I always declined due to scheduling and my own training. I always had an excuse as to why I couldn't hang out. (Basically, I didn't take the time.) I did mention she should start preparing herself for the race. I was concerned that she wasn't prepared. Although she had ran a marathon years ago, weekly running was not a part of her regular routine. Nonetheless, she looked to be in good shape, slim and definitely took care of herself.
When I crossed that finish line, never did I imagine or even think to consider that something so tragic could/would happen to my friend. In fact, I was so consumed with "Runners High" afterwards that I didn't think about anyone/anything except meeting my family and contacting my coach. When I returned to the hotel room, I saw that Rose had called me at 7:52am and left a voice mail. She then sent me a text message at 7:56:19 that read: GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN, CALL OR TEXT ME WHEN YOU ARE DONE. I sent her a text message at 10:22am asking HOW DID YOU DO? only I never heard back. She was already gone yet I did not know.
Monday morning I wait for Rose at our regular meeting spot but she does not come. I figure she's late and go about my day. At about 5:00pm that evening, I receive an email saying that she had passed away at the race. I was in compete shock I gasped for air. My kids were really nervous, asking questions-Mommy, what's wrong? Are you okay? What happened? I tried to pretend that everything was okay. I immediately went to my computer to check for the news. I was in denial. I called Rose and left a message for her, my voice cracking. I sent her a text message and another email. There had to be some mistake. I turned on the local news and then her story popped up. I cried. Rose was gone.
Today, 2 days after her passing, my cell phone rings and rings. I run to answer it and my heart races. The caller ID says Rose. I think...oh my god, she's alive. I answer the phone. Hello? Hello? Rose! Silence....I start to freak out....am I receiving a call from a dead person? I shout Rose! Rose! All of a sudden, a voice that sounds like hers but isn't speaks. It's her mom. The most difficult conversation I have ever had was this one. Speaking with someone who just lost their child....its horrific. Rose was too young to die! I tried to comfort her mom in the best way I knew how. We cried together. I told her how often (daily) Rose spoke of her family and how much she missed them. I can't imagine what it is like for a parent to have to bury their own child and I hope to never experience this. It was an extremely painful yet wonderful conversation because I reminded her of how special her daughter, Rose was. And just like my friendship with Rose, we immediately bonded and that in itself gave her the comfort I think she needed at that moment. I was able to share with her Rose's last voicemail/text conversation and the optimism and excitement that Rose had up to the very last minute. The grief and guilt parents carry for their own naturally is just so overwhelming and ....I don't even have the words right now. I assured her mom that Rose was happy and enjoyed living life up to her very last breath. She wanted to run this race and not because she was competitive but simply just for fun. Rose=Fun.
I never heard a siren or saw an ambulance. I don't even know where or what mile she collapsed. In fact, I didn't even know that she was gone and that's what makes it all the more shocking. How could we be at the same event and yet I hear nothing? It took more than 24 hours before I had found out. I was her last phone call. I wonder, was that her final good bye? I mean really, who call's to wish their friend GOOD LUCK right before start time?! Rose did. That's just the kind of wonderful, thoughtful person she is.
You never know when your life will be gone or when your life's mission is over. Enjoy life like Rose--to the fullest so that way, when its time to go, you're doing something you enjoy. The timing will never be perfect for anyone but that's just how life is.
Monday, September 28, 2009
I sit here checking out the Facebook page. Looking back at some of my past postings, does anyone really care that I went for a swim or a long run? Probably not, but at the time, I felt the need to post it. I look at a lot of pictures of FRIENDS, comments people post about where they went and what they did. Then there's the occasional posting that causes such a stir amongst FRIENDS and lastly, just the realization of it all that someone isn't really a FRIEND and that you don't care what they are watching on tv or where they went for the weekend, and better yet, why are you reading/receiving their post?!
I am sure if you looked in your facebook FRIENDS list, there are probably a good number of people that if you think about it, why are you following them or better yet, why are you sending them highlights? I've got this one friend that I read postings from and I just think to myself, why? Many of the posts sound so privileged, so "I'm a snooty stay-at-home SF mom," that I really want to comment back-GO FUCK YOURSELF. Or the stupid posting that causes a Facebook comment war where your FRIEND'S Friends, who are complete strangers to you, are insulting you when you're just defending the selfish "what's on your mind" posting that your so-called FRIEND happened to write without thinking about who is on their FRIEND list....which goes back to my question-how many of your FRIENDS are in fact your FRIENDS?
Some people have 200+ friends. Are they all friends? Or just people you reconnected with through Facebook? Better yet, does every FRIEND in your Facebook account need to know that you went to Napa for the weekend? Or that you bought a pair of shoes, or went to a fancy dinner? I think not. In fact, its annoying and probably equally annoying when I tell the 42 FRIENDS (yes, I only have 42, okay....maybe 30 after cleanup time) that I am going for a 13 mile run. Why do I post it? Not really sure. Perhaps one day, I wish that someone would actually care to comment-why do you run so much? Or where did you run to? In fact, the only person I can count on for a comment regularly is my dad-there's my point. He cares about my daily activities. Everyone else could care less. And when you use Facebook to brag about going to the spa, shopping, etc. your FRIENDS could probably care less as well. Okay-I do care about a good pair of shoes and a great sale but bragging of any kind, I'm just not that interested in or impressed by. And yes, when I post that I ran 13 miles, etc.--yes, I AM bragging and you could probably care less as well, except for my good ole'dad.
Pictures--this is a funny one. I love seeing my mom friends post pics of themselves in bikinis. I always comment back Hot Mama! I mean common...why else would you post a solo shot of yourself in a bikini except to show everyone how good you look in one? Hey, if you're a mom and can get away wearing a bikini, then you should be proud of it! Other than that, posed photos, head shots, etc. one photo is plenty, but an entire album dedicated to yourself, again, NOBODY cares except probably your parents and even then, there comes an age and time in one's life when even the parents don't need an entire album of just YOU. (Unless you are a model.)
Okay-no more run/swim postings from me!
It's cleanup time!
I am sure if you looked in your facebook FRIENDS list, there are probably a good number of people that if you think about it, why are you following them or better yet, why are you sending them highlights? I've got this one friend that I read postings from and I just think to myself, why? Many of the posts sound so privileged, so "I'm a snooty stay-at-home SF mom," that I really want to comment back-GO FUCK YOURSELF. Or the stupid posting that causes a Facebook comment war where your FRIEND'S Friends, who are complete strangers to you, are insulting you when you're just defending the selfish "what's on your mind" posting that your so-called FRIEND happened to write without thinking about who is on their FRIEND list....which goes back to my question-how many of your FRIENDS are in fact your FRIENDS?
Some people have 200+ friends. Are they all friends? Or just people you reconnected with through Facebook? Better yet, does every FRIEND in your Facebook account need to know that you went to Napa for the weekend? Or that you bought a pair of shoes, or went to a fancy dinner? I think not. In fact, its annoying and probably equally annoying when I tell the 42 FRIENDS (yes, I only have 42, okay....maybe 30 after cleanup time) that I am going for a 13 mile run. Why do I post it? Not really sure. Perhaps one day, I wish that someone would actually care to comment-why do you run so much? Or where did you run to? In fact, the only person I can count on for a comment regularly is my dad-there's my point. He cares about my daily activities. Everyone else could care less. And when you use Facebook to brag about going to the spa, shopping, etc. your FRIENDS could probably care less as well. Okay-I do care about a good pair of shoes and a great sale but bragging of any kind, I'm just not that interested in or impressed by. And yes, when I post that I ran 13 miles, etc.--yes, I AM bragging and you could probably care less as well, except for my good ole'dad.
Pictures--this is a funny one. I love seeing my mom friends post pics of themselves in bikinis. I always comment back Hot Mama! I mean common...why else would you post a solo shot of yourself in a bikini except to show everyone how good you look in one? Hey, if you're a mom and can get away wearing a bikini, then you should be proud of it! Other than that, posed photos, head shots, etc. one photo is plenty, but an entire album dedicated to yourself, again, NOBODY cares except probably your parents and even then, there comes an age and time in one's life when even the parents don't need an entire album of just YOU. (Unless you are a model.)
Okay-no more run/swim postings from me!
It's cleanup time!
Saturday, September 26, 2009
First Month
The first month of kindergarten is ovah!! Kiddo did great. No complaints. Got the morning routine down, breakfast, uniform and all! Its been a roller coaster transition for everyone. What have I learned??? Kindergarten means WORK. And for a stay-at-home mom/dad, its the beginning of going back to work.
I haven't been this busy since 2002. I was living in NYC, working in publicity for an A-List Celebrity PR Firm. I was constantly under pressure from magazine deadlines, photo shoots, and needy celebrities, not to mention their daily desperate seeking "get me in US Weekly tactics" all the while still being responsible for my day to day work and trying to please the publicists for whom I worked with. A typical workday started at 9am and went well into the late evening since we had clients on the West Coast and usually an event after hours. A 12 hour workday with no breaks in between was the norm. Fast forward a few years, 2 beautiful girls later, we were FINALLY on an afternoon preschool schedule!! This meant late morning wake up calls (9am) and leisurly hanging out until we were ready to go. It was definitely a year to catch up on sleep!
Kindergarten unfortunately puts us right back on the early morning schedule. Add to that school responsibilities and trying to train for a marathon, its non-stop literally from 7am-5:00pm. Oh, and don't forget my work at the preschool. The combination of working on a big school event and starting a new school campaign, its been non-stop driving here and there to meet with this person and that person, pickups, more meetings, etc. I envisioned kindergarten to give me 3 hours to run wild in the wind! So WRONG! I was warned though. All of my friends who have been there, done that said Kindergarten would be a busy year. They were RIGHT!
Those long runs I have dreamt about for so long have been replaced with meetings--or at least for this month. For the first time in a loooong time, I have had to shower early, put on makeup, wear nice clothes, and oh....wash my hair (you all know I HATE doing this!!) just so I can meet with "important" people, which for me, can be a bit overwhelming. After spending the past few years around people under 3 feet tall who hardly spoke a word to being in a room with people over 5 feet tall and actually having to have an adult conversation has let's say......left me feel quite petite (I'm just 5ft)and flustered.
It's a BIG change going from "circle time" to a morning meeting with an Executive. Sounds so serious, right? Well, it is. I have to remain... what's that word...focused? Yes, focused, something that really hasn't crossed my mind in a very long time outside of online banking. Staying focused means planning ahead,(yes, I bought a planner) creating documents (eloquently written letters)and spreadsheets (why is Excel so damn difficult??), budgets (when have I ever had one) and school goals (TBD). Yip, that's me. It's like I'm this other person! This is what kindergarten has done to me. It's made me go back to work except without a paycheck! It's been 20 hour work weeks, totally volunteer, completely unpaid, zero, zilch, nada. Yet, its been the best work I have ever performed!!
Chairing my first BIG event has been a wonderful learning experience for me. It has forced me to open up, be professional, make new contacts, converse with people outside my comfort zone, and bring me back to "work mode." It has given me a sense of purpose in day to day life. It's not that being a full time mother hasn't given me purpose. It's just that "work" demands respect that a "homemaker" lacks. When you say, I have a meeting, or a conference call, it sounds important. Going to the park doesnt-even though it may be critical. Sad to say, but it brings something new to the dinner table rather than being asked how the park was. I love the fact that I have a legitimate reason for not answering the phone other than I didn't hear it! I love saying, "Sorry, but I was in a meeting" or "I have to call you back." It's invigorating in its own sick way. While dad goes to work to $upport the family, mom continues to run the household and has a part-time and very rewarding side job! Who would have thought?
I have also started a new campaign at the school, the first of its kind!! It is a year long campaign that I have committed to for the 2009-1010 school year. It is my "new baby." While this "new baby" doesn't require pumping or burping, it does ask for some pampering, a lot of attention, and drive. And like a real baby, it requires me to be committed 100%. This has also meant that sometimes, my "real" kids don't come first. This campaign has also filled a void that I have had since both my kids started school yet gives me a way that I can still be connected with them and through them but not necessarily with them.
Perhaps its the new Kindergarten Parent in me that wants to jump in, roll up her sleeves and get involved. I can't imagine every parent, every year being this busy. So far, Kindergarten has brought on a lot of mixed emotions for me. I truly want to be involved but I'm afraid that I will be in my daughter's way and her independence. I want to show her that I am a parent who is involved, but am I invading her space? It doesn't matter. I am a parent who loves her child, who want to help her thrive and I will do whatever it takes to help her succeed. And if this means missing a tempo run and seeing her at recess, then so be it.
And might I add-I LOVE being BUSY!
I haven't been this busy since 2002. I was living in NYC, working in publicity for an A-List Celebrity PR Firm. I was constantly under pressure from magazine deadlines, photo shoots, and needy celebrities, not to mention their daily desperate seeking "get me in US Weekly tactics" all the while still being responsible for my day to day work and trying to please the publicists for whom I worked with. A typical workday started at 9am and went well into the late evening since we had clients on the West Coast and usually an event after hours. A 12 hour workday with no breaks in between was the norm. Fast forward a few years, 2 beautiful girls later, we were FINALLY on an afternoon preschool schedule!! This meant late morning wake up calls (9am) and leisurly hanging out until we were ready to go. It was definitely a year to catch up on sleep!
Kindergarten unfortunately puts us right back on the early morning schedule. Add to that school responsibilities and trying to train for a marathon, its non-stop literally from 7am-5:00pm. Oh, and don't forget my work at the preschool. The combination of working on a big school event and starting a new school campaign, its been non-stop driving here and there to meet with this person and that person, pickups, more meetings, etc. I envisioned kindergarten to give me 3 hours to run wild in the wind! So WRONG! I was warned though. All of my friends who have been there, done that said Kindergarten would be a busy year. They were RIGHT!
Those long runs I have dreamt about for so long have been replaced with meetings--or at least for this month. For the first time in a loooong time, I have had to shower early, put on makeup, wear nice clothes, and oh....wash my hair (you all know I HATE doing this!!) just so I can meet with "important" people, which for me, can be a bit overwhelming. After spending the past few years around people under 3 feet tall who hardly spoke a word to being in a room with people over 5 feet tall and actually having to have an adult conversation has let's say......left me feel quite petite (I'm just 5ft)and flustered.
It's a BIG change going from "circle time" to a morning meeting with an Executive. Sounds so serious, right? Well, it is. I have to remain... what's that word...focused? Yes, focused, something that really hasn't crossed my mind in a very long time outside of online banking. Staying focused means planning ahead,(yes, I bought a planner) creating documents (eloquently written letters)and spreadsheets (why is Excel so damn difficult??), budgets (when have I ever had one) and school goals (TBD). Yip, that's me. It's like I'm this other person! This is what kindergarten has done to me. It's made me go back to work except without a paycheck! It's been 20 hour work weeks, totally volunteer, completely unpaid, zero, zilch, nada. Yet, its been the best work I have ever performed!!
Chairing my first BIG event has been a wonderful learning experience for me. It has forced me to open up, be professional, make new contacts, converse with people outside my comfort zone, and bring me back to "work mode." It has given me a sense of purpose in day to day life. It's not that being a full time mother hasn't given me purpose. It's just that "work" demands respect that a "homemaker" lacks. When you say, I have a meeting, or a conference call, it sounds important. Going to the park doesnt-even though it may be critical. Sad to say, but it brings something new to the dinner table rather than being asked how the park was. I love the fact that I have a legitimate reason for not answering the phone other than I didn't hear it! I love saying, "Sorry, but I was in a meeting" or "I have to call you back." It's invigorating in its own sick way. While dad goes to work to $upport the family, mom continues to run the household and has a part-time and very rewarding side job! Who would have thought?
I have also started a new campaign at the school, the first of its kind!! It is a year long campaign that I have committed to for the 2009-1010 school year. It is my "new baby." While this "new baby" doesn't require pumping or burping, it does ask for some pampering, a lot of attention, and drive. And like a real baby, it requires me to be committed 100%. This has also meant that sometimes, my "real" kids don't come first. This campaign has also filled a void that I have had since both my kids started school yet gives me a way that I can still be connected with them and through them but not necessarily with them.
Perhaps its the new Kindergarten Parent in me that wants to jump in, roll up her sleeves and get involved. I can't imagine every parent, every year being this busy. So far, Kindergarten has brought on a lot of mixed emotions for me. I truly want to be involved but I'm afraid that I will be in my daughter's way and her independence. I want to show her that I am a parent who is involved, but am I invading her space? It doesn't matter. I am a parent who loves her child, who want to help her thrive and I will do whatever it takes to help her succeed. And if this means missing a tempo run and seeing her at recess, then so be it.
And might I add-I LOVE being BUSY!
Monday, September 21, 2009
Healthy Eating
What is healthy eating?? Is it eating a diet of fruits and vegetables? Organic? Vegan? Shopping at stores such as Whole Foods or Trader Joe's? I am on a healthy eating kids crusade. In planning a Halloween event for 300 children, I decided it was my mission to not only have a fun event, but to have healthy foods and snacks as well. I am sure there will some moaning and groaning when someone shows up at the cotton candy line only to be greeted by a caramel apple (ugh...okay, not really...this is a compromise!) or a sneer at the organic juice being offered rather than a coca-cola, or the chocolate granola bar over the brownie. I think most parents will agree that kids can still get "jacked" up on healthy food without all the unnecessary artificial sweeteners and preservatives. And puh-leeze, don't call me a party pooper! All of our kids will and do have their fair share of treats regularly. But lets be honest here: most carnivals and fun events for kids are usually filled with crap overkill--fried foods, cotton candy, snow cones (which usually are half eaten then tossed) and sodas, all of which contriubute to sticky fingers, tummy aches, and the inevitable...sugar overload meltdown. (which I am sooooo ovah!)
My "healthy" mission started just a few months ago. I started training for a marathon and decided to see if my body would actually feel better if I changed what I ate since the saying goes, "you are what you eat," and I didn't want to be that Krispy Kreme Donut! My healthier food choices started! I s-l-o-w-l-y traded in my typical breakfast of "crap" aka--donuts, sweet muffins, leftover chocolate cake (you get the idea) and had oatmeal with fresh fruit instead. Lunch was now leftovers from dinner, and dinner was chicken cooked in every and any possible way minus the fatty sauces. I added LOTS of fruit into my regular eating(something I had NEVER done before) and gave up my love/hate relationship with beef. No more pizza 3 times a week or donut holes in the middle of the day with my little one. I now carry a bag of almonds,protein bars, etc. in my bag for mid afternoon snacking. Again, I am NOT dieting. I am making healthy eating decisions.
The first change I noticed was the difference in the way my body felt-both during and afters workouts, and on my recovery days. Rather than feeling sluggish, I felt more energized and strong. After my first 2 weeks, I decided that this would be a lifestyle change for my family. My kids controlled what they ate for so long (frozen crap) that I finally put my foot down and started having them eat real food rather than opening the freezer for their meals. I traded in pizza pockets and canned soups for roasted chicken, turkey burgers veggies and more whole grains (brown rice/wheat pasta). As I continued on this eating healthier lifestyle, I decided to look further into what is healthy and what does it mean to me.
Many people assume that because you shop at a certain store, you are buying healthy. If you are buying organic, you are buying healthy. Healthy eating means making good eating decisions that will improve your health and make you feel good. It means a diet of good proteins, vitamins, carbohydrates, and water. Not everything we eat is healthy. If I want to eat an Oreo cookie, I want the real deal and not a knock-off. These types of foods should be eaten in moderation. You can't be perfect in eating all the time. You gotta live a little, but making the right healthy decisions on a daily basis isn't that difficult, but its up to you to make the right choices.
Healthy eating choices need to be taught to our children as well. As parents, it is our duty to teach them that eating should be fun yet healthy. They need to learn and understand what vitamins and nutrition are. Every time my kids ask why they have to eat something, I tell them every health benefit that comes to mind along with the typical.....you're going to grow big and strong and you're going to eat it because I said so! (the later the most important!)
The biggest eating dilemma for our family is eating away from home. Healthy eating habits should but do not apply at restaurants. Okay-I understand the occasional pizza/burger joint meal. But what really pisses me off is that I have gotten very good at feeding my kids quality meals at home; however, when we go to a restaurant, the kid's menu is a child's delight! Fried food choices, fake macaroni and cheese, not to mention other high sodium choices, and quite frankly, an array of foods that are not even edible!! Have you ever noticed how little your child eats when you are at a restaurant? Its because your child is served a plate of shit while you are eating something that tastes good! The only bang you get for your buck while dining out with a child is that their drink cup is left empty! They sucked down their lemonade so fast that you didn't have the chance to take it back after you realized that it was "fake" lemonade. From a healthy perspective, you were probably better off ordering the Sprite soda!
Kids know that when the are not at home, their food choices are crap and that they are in control of their dining situation. They live for this!! But deep down, they don't like the crap either. Their bowel movements are mushy and weird colors. And they don't feel good inside! They get jacked up on garbage and then they crash...HARD! If you teach your kids healthy eating habits they will make good decisions on their own. You might be surprised!
Restaurants feel they are catering to us but they aren't. By having these kid-menus, they offer parents a piece of paper, 3 crayons, peace for a few minutes and a plate of indegestion! I mean yes, when I look at my child happily coloring away and I can have a 5 minute uninterrupted conversation, it seems like paradise.... but is it worth my kidding eating a crappy meal or hardly at all? It is never pleasant to go to a restaurant with a toddler. Uninterrupted conversation is best left for date night. Or better yet, how about after dinner, getting home to hear, "I'm hungry." No shit--you ate nothing!! Vacation is even worse!! How many of you have come back wishing you could give your kids a cleanse from the fried foods? !
I hope you will reconsider your child's food options the next time you are at a restaurant. Just take a look and judge for yourself. If it isn't good enough for you, it shouldn't be good enough for your kids. And if you have that taste for restaurant food, opt for takeout, prepare something healthy for your kids, and put the kiddos down earlier for that "extra" conversation time.
My "healthy" mission started just a few months ago. I started training for a marathon and decided to see if my body would actually feel better if I changed what I ate since the saying goes, "you are what you eat," and I didn't want to be that Krispy Kreme Donut! My healthier food choices started! I s-l-o-w-l-y traded in my typical breakfast of "crap" aka--donuts, sweet muffins, leftover chocolate cake (you get the idea) and had oatmeal with fresh fruit instead. Lunch was now leftovers from dinner, and dinner was chicken cooked in every and any possible way minus the fatty sauces. I added LOTS of fruit into my regular eating(something I had NEVER done before) and gave up my love/hate relationship with beef. No more pizza 3 times a week or donut holes in the middle of the day with my little one. I now carry a bag of almonds,protein bars, etc. in my bag for mid afternoon snacking. Again, I am NOT dieting. I am making healthy eating decisions.
The first change I noticed was the difference in the way my body felt-both during and afters workouts, and on my recovery days. Rather than feeling sluggish, I felt more energized and strong. After my first 2 weeks, I decided that this would be a lifestyle change for my family. My kids controlled what they ate for so long (frozen crap) that I finally put my foot down and started having them eat real food rather than opening the freezer for their meals. I traded in pizza pockets and canned soups for roasted chicken, turkey burgers veggies and more whole grains (brown rice/wheat pasta). As I continued on this eating healthier lifestyle, I decided to look further into what is healthy and what does it mean to me.
Many people assume that because you shop at a certain store, you are buying healthy. If you are buying organic, you are buying healthy. Healthy eating means making good eating decisions that will improve your health and make you feel good. It means a diet of good proteins, vitamins, carbohydrates, and water. Not everything we eat is healthy. If I want to eat an Oreo cookie, I want the real deal and not a knock-off. These types of foods should be eaten in moderation. You can't be perfect in eating all the time. You gotta live a little, but making the right healthy decisions on a daily basis isn't that difficult, but its up to you to make the right choices.
Healthy eating choices need to be taught to our children as well. As parents, it is our duty to teach them that eating should be fun yet healthy. They need to learn and understand what vitamins and nutrition are. Every time my kids ask why they have to eat something, I tell them every health benefit that comes to mind along with the typical.....you're going to grow big and strong and you're going to eat it because I said so! (the later the most important!)
The biggest eating dilemma for our family is eating away from home. Healthy eating habits should but do not apply at restaurants. Okay-I understand the occasional pizza/burger joint meal. But what really pisses me off is that I have gotten very good at feeding my kids quality meals at home; however, when we go to a restaurant, the kid's menu is a child's delight! Fried food choices, fake macaroni and cheese, not to mention other high sodium choices, and quite frankly, an array of foods that are not even edible!! Have you ever noticed how little your child eats when you are at a restaurant? Its because your child is served a plate of shit while you are eating something that tastes good! The only bang you get for your buck while dining out with a child is that their drink cup is left empty! They sucked down their lemonade so fast that you didn't have the chance to take it back after you realized that it was "fake" lemonade. From a healthy perspective, you were probably better off ordering the Sprite soda!
Kids know that when the are not at home, their food choices are crap and that they are in control of their dining situation. They live for this!! But deep down, they don't like the crap either. Their bowel movements are mushy and weird colors. And they don't feel good inside! They get jacked up on garbage and then they crash...HARD! If you teach your kids healthy eating habits they will make good decisions on their own. You might be surprised!
Restaurants feel they are catering to us but they aren't. By having these kid-menus, they offer parents a piece of paper, 3 crayons, peace for a few minutes and a plate of indegestion! I mean yes, when I look at my child happily coloring away and I can have a 5 minute uninterrupted conversation, it seems like paradise.... but is it worth my kidding eating a crappy meal or hardly at all? It is never pleasant to go to a restaurant with a toddler. Uninterrupted conversation is best left for date night. Or better yet, how about after dinner, getting home to hear, "I'm hungry." No shit--you ate nothing!! Vacation is even worse!! How many of you have come back wishing you could give your kids a cleanse from the fried foods? !
I hope you will reconsider your child's food options the next time you are at a restaurant. Just take a look and judge for yourself. If it isn't good enough for you, it shouldn't be good enough for your kids. And if you have that taste for restaurant food, opt for takeout, prepare something healthy for your kids, and put the kiddos down earlier for that "extra" conversation time.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Insomnia
Insomnia is the inability to sleep. I started to have this problem ever since Kindergarten began. I worry that I will not hear the alarm clock to wake her up, causing her to miss school. I worry she will arrive late and be told to get a tardy slip, or that she doesn't have to time to see her friends before the bell rings (very important). I worry that she won't eat her lunch or drink enough water, or that she'll be too tired to swim after school, or that we'll miss something because of traffic. I worry that Nana might forget to pick her up, and that she will be the last kid sitting there all by herself. I worry early in the morning, all day, and into the night. I cannot sleep. I have insomnia.
There was once a time in my life when I would fall fast asleep and not wake up until 12 o'clock in the afternoon. Now I am lucky if I can get to sleep at all. I use my late nights writing, surfing the Internet, lifting weights, facebook and stuffing my face. I sit and stare at the computer for hours on everything from news, clothes, food, celebrity gossip, etc. I can spend hours just reading about home improvements!! Before you know it, its one o'clock in the morning. As I proceed downstairs to bed, I make a pit stop to the bathroom. Another 20 minutes goes by as I stand in front of the mirror plucking away at my eyebrows. Then I get into bed and stare at the clock. I double, triple check to make sure the alarm is on LOUD. Then I lay there thinking about everything. Another 20 minutes goes by. I turn to look at the clock to make sure that I haven't missed the alarm. Its only 2am! "Okay," I say to myself. "You have about 5 hours, 15 minutes to sleep." Finally, I am out cold only to wake up in a panic and often times a sweat. Did I miss the alarm? I turn and look, it's 3:15am. This goes on literally every hour on the hour until...it's 7:15am and I wake up before the alarm. Now I am completely exhausted. Now, I want to sleep but I can't. I've got to get everyone ready to go to school and start our day.
My kids love to sleep. Ever since they were infants, I was fortunate enough to be able to sleep until around 9am. Things changed once preschool started, but still, waking up at 8:15am with two kids under the age of 3 ain't bad. Sometimes we would over sleep but that was okay. Missing preschool didn't matter but in Kindergarten it does! Missing school means going to school the next day with a note. It means making up homework and missed assignments. There is no longer the option of, "let just stay home today." In Kindergarten, mom has to prepare lunch and breakfast before 7:30am with sleep or not. In Kindergarten it means getting cleaned up in 15 minutes, eating in 10 and getting dressed in 5. And it means rushing out the door after that in 2. Kindergarten for a parent means being in a hurry, worrying, wondering, thinking, creating, and the obvious....not sleeping.
Perhaps sleeping is overrated? I mean I seem to function just fine throughout my day. I run/swim with barely any sleep. I continue with all my regular routines with little sleep. I manage to still cook, clean and do laundry. The only change is that I actually pulled out a tube of concealer today. I slathered it under my eyes like sunscreen. Wow! What a difference! I look.......well, like I've slept for hours!! So, who needs sleep when I can make it look like I do?!
Honestly, insomnia is happening because of all the changes that are going on. Kindergarten is a new beginning not just for your child, but for you as a parent. It is really amazing to see the transition these kids have made from preschool to Kindergarten! They are bigger, stronger, and well...they aren't crying and asking you to stay. In fact, they want you to leave! They make their "own" friends rather than playing with the preschool parents' kid you associated with. Kindergarten is on their terms. You are not just merely dropping them off. In fact, its the other way around!! They are leaving you and they know this! No more stopping by for circle time. No more hanging out singing songs! No more class parties taking pictures!! In fact, they have lost interest in parents in general! They have friends everywhere. 1st graders, 7th graders, 3rd graders. It's like their own world of little people just like them! I am the outsider showing up in my sloppy running shorts while they are all dressed-up in their pretty navy blue jumpers and shorts. Oh gosh, is my daughter embarrassed by me??!! Is this why she just high five's me when I leave?? Come to think of it, I met an 8th grader walking to school the other day, and she was embarrassed that she had a babysitter accompanying her to school!
Is this is why I am losing sleep! Why, of course!! My little girl is now a BIG girl and I want her to remain a little girl at my convenience. Okay-wait a minute. That sounds totally selfish! I am totally selfish-who am I trying to fool here? I mean, yes I want her to be a big girl and get a glass of water by herself when I am trying to read a magazine. I want her to be a big girl and wipe her own butt when I am trying to have a conversation on the phone. I want her to watch Little Einsteins because I am too lazy to get off the couch! But deep down, truth be told, I want her to be a big girl but I want her to be my baby FOREVER too. I want that sticker-wearing "I'm proud to be a Kindergartner" person to be my little baby so I can kiss her whenever I want, call her by her nickname "Bugaboo" and most importantly, so I can get some fucking sleep!
There was once a time in my life when I would fall fast asleep and not wake up until 12 o'clock in the afternoon. Now I am lucky if I can get to sleep at all. I use my late nights writing, surfing the Internet, lifting weights, facebook and stuffing my face. I sit and stare at the computer for hours on everything from news, clothes, food, celebrity gossip, etc. I can spend hours just reading about home improvements!! Before you know it, its one o'clock in the morning. As I proceed downstairs to bed, I make a pit stop to the bathroom. Another 20 minutes goes by as I stand in front of the mirror plucking away at my eyebrows. Then I get into bed and stare at the clock. I double, triple check to make sure the alarm is on LOUD. Then I lay there thinking about everything. Another 20 minutes goes by. I turn to look at the clock to make sure that I haven't missed the alarm. Its only 2am! "Okay," I say to myself. "You have about 5 hours, 15 minutes to sleep." Finally, I am out cold only to wake up in a panic and often times a sweat. Did I miss the alarm? I turn and look, it's 3:15am. This goes on literally every hour on the hour until...it's 7:15am and I wake up before the alarm. Now I am completely exhausted. Now, I want to sleep but I can't. I've got to get everyone ready to go to school and start our day.
My kids love to sleep. Ever since they were infants, I was fortunate enough to be able to sleep until around 9am. Things changed once preschool started, but still, waking up at 8:15am with two kids under the age of 3 ain't bad. Sometimes we would over sleep but that was okay. Missing preschool didn't matter but in Kindergarten it does! Missing school means going to school the next day with a note. It means making up homework and missed assignments. There is no longer the option of, "let just stay home today." In Kindergarten, mom has to prepare lunch and breakfast before 7:30am with sleep or not. In Kindergarten it means getting cleaned up in 15 minutes, eating in 10 and getting dressed in 5. And it means rushing out the door after that in 2. Kindergarten for a parent means being in a hurry, worrying, wondering, thinking, creating, and the obvious....not sleeping.
Perhaps sleeping is overrated? I mean I seem to function just fine throughout my day. I run/swim with barely any sleep. I continue with all my regular routines with little sleep. I manage to still cook, clean and do laundry. The only change is that I actually pulled out a tube of concealer today. I slathered it under my eyes like sunscreen. Wow! What a difference! I look.......well, like I've slept for hours!! So, who needs sleep when I can make it look like I do?!
Honestly, insomnia is happening because of all the changes that are going on. Kindergarten is a new beginning not just for your child, but for you as a parent. It is really amazing to see the transition these kids have made from preschool to Kindergarten! They are bigger, stronger, and well...they aren't crying and asking you to stay. In fact, they want you to leave! They make their "own" friends rather than playing with the preschool parents' kid you associated with. Kindergarten is on their terms. You are not just merely dropping them off. In fact, its the other way around!! They are leaving you and they know this! No more stopping by for circle time. No more hanging out singing songs! No more class parties taking pictures!! In fact, they have lost interest in parents in general! They have friends everywhere. 1st graders, 7th graders, 3rd graders. It's like their own world of little people just like them! I am the outsider showing up in my sloppy running shorts while they are all dressed-up in their pretty navy blue jumpers and shorts. Oh gosh, is my daughter embarrassed by me??!! Is this why she just high five's me when I leave?? Come to think of it, I met an 8th grader walking to school the other day, and she was embarrassed that she had a babysitter accompanying her to school!
Is this is why I am losing sleep! Why, of course!! My little girl is now a BIG girl and I want her to remain a little girl at my convenience. Okay-wait a minute. That sounds totally selfish! I am totally selfish-who am I trying to fool here? I mean, yes I want her to be a big girl and get a glass of water by herself when I am trying to read a magazine. I want her to be a big girl and wipe her own butt when I am trying to have a conversation on the phone. I want her to watch Little Einsteins because I am too lazy to get off the couch! But deep down, truth be told, I want her to be a big girl but I want her to be my baby FOREVER too. I want that sticker-wearing "I'm proud to be a Kindergartner" person to be my little baby so I can kiss her whenever I want, call her by her nickname "Bugaboo" and most importantly, so I can get some fucking sleep!
Friday, September 18, 2009
Partner
Have you ever thought about how little time you make for your partner? You know, that person who contributed in the baby making process?! Your so-called other half? You make time for your kids, their activities, playdates, schools, the gym. You even make time to grab your latte at Starbucks! You make time to shower, pick out your outfit..you get the point. But what about your partner? Do you make time for your partner? Kids or not, ask yourself this question. Do you remember the beginning, when it was just the two of you and everything was so perfect? No responsibilities. Just the two of you...
Kids are like vampires. They literally suck everything out of you. My day starts at 7:15am and goes until 1am. Even when the kids are at school, I still eat, breathe, think and smell kids. I use my few hours to squeeze in my oh-so important run/swim. I am so pressed for time that just thinking about how I am going to get my workout in stresses me out. As I run, I think about what they are doing at school, what I will feed them for dinner, etc. I constantly think about my kids.
(Six hours go by and haven't spoken to other half or thought about other half. Very busy day)
There was once a time in my life when all I ever thought about was me and X.(explained below) I never left the house without lipstick, mascara and high heels. Okay-this was about 5 years ago, but I still reminisce! Even with my first pregnancy, I still rocked the stiletto heals. Then came the baby, nursing boobies, and and the lack of desire to look good and the lack of desire period. I stopped caring about looking good as I was so consumed with the baby.
The lipstick was the first to go-I kissed the baby so often that just applying it was pointless. Then the clothes-since I was nursing, I lived in $100 t-shirts, and then thought to myself what a complete waste of money since once the "big boobies" were gone, the T's would never fit. And of course the shoes...which I still stare at in their beautiful boxes lined ever so neatly in my closet. How Carrie Bradshaw of me, right? (Except I prefer Louboutin and Barbara Bui over Manolos any day.) The heels have since been replaced by flip flops and ballet flats. Soon after, baby #2 came, and my appearance has remained the same for the past 5 years. As for the desire factor, well, I remember my dad jokingly asking when I called him on Father's Day 2005 to tell him he was going to be a grandpa again, "'What are you...the Immaculate Conception?'"
Summer 2008, I discovered running. This was a huge tipping point for me. I discovered a hobby outside my kids; something I had not had in 5 years. It started with 45 minutes here and there. I focused on making time to run and now, well, its an obsession. Remember that--I FOCUSED. I run six days a week. Working out is an obsession for me. When I don't run, I swim and on some days, I do both. Since that summer, I have transformed into a completely different person. The "old" me is back except without all the war paint and uncomfortable shoes. Did you read what I just said? The "old" me--NOT!
Once upon a time, there was this Girl who fell in love with a wonderful Man. He was big, tall, and had a lot of dark hair. For this blog, let's call him X. X was funny. He made her laugh. She would get butterflies waiting for X at a bar, restaurant, or wherever they were meeting. In a crowded room, they could always find each other; they would some how make eye contact in a crowd and he would wink from afar. They would travel. It was Paris for Valentine's Day one year. Dinners at trendy NYC restaurants. Weekends in Healdsburg.
First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes someone in the baby carriage.....
When Girl was pregnant, they agreed that they wouldn't eat at chain restaurants, that they would still "have a life," that dad would be able to have his free time everyday after work, that they would keep all of their really nice glass tables, and here's the best one, that nothing between them would ever change.
Rule #1-Before baby is born, don't make promises of any kind regarding your so-called new life.
Rule #2-Don't be a food snob.
Rule #3-Your so-called life changes
Rule #4-you despise the fact that X still gets to have a life
Rule #5-Glass BREAKS
Rule #6-This is the most important. Your relationship with your partner is about to change forever.
If you follow these steps, you should have a perfect relationship!
5 years have gone by and things are very different. As a stay at home parent, I take on the full time role of being that Super Woman. I changed diapers, baths, Dr.'s appointments, activities, play dates, etc. The list goes on and on. After being out for most of the day doing these things, its then dinner, baths, cleaning up the house, folding the laundry, and trying to get the house somewhat organized before X comes home. Oh X-remember the person who used to make your stomach twitter with excitement? The only twitter I have now is my Twitter account that I don't even use. I am sick of pizza, chicken fingers and french fries. When I walk into Johnny Rockets, they know our order. By the time kids are fed, bathed, and put to bed, its just about 8pm. That gives me almost 2 hours to spend with X, and a large portion of that is spent in the kitchen getting our dinner ready and cleaning.
Now, I still love X. But X too has changed. For one, he doesn't have all the hair he used too...(I'm just being honest here.) I can't remember the last time we had a conversation that lasted more than 30 minutes uninterrupted (phone, blackberry, crying kid, disagreement, knock on the door. What happened to our promise that nothing would ever change? Were we really that naive about our new mission we were about to embark on? The answer is YES.
As I ran my long 2 hour run today, I thought about if I focused on X as much as I do my kids or even running for that matter, what would be left of me? Is it possible to carve out any more time in my day? You see, carving out time could be something simple as a small kind gesture. For X, it maybe writing a note in his suitcase like I used to. Or picking out a tie. These gestures don't take any addtional time in one's day. It just takes being thoughtful and I know X would love any attention thrown his way.
X was and is my original baby yet is treated more like the step-child. I feel bad saying it but its true. Being a good mother has taken all of me but has turned me into a neglectful partner. If I were the kind of parent that I am partner, well....let's just say, the kids might not be living with their mama. I am a terrific mother but a mediocre wife. It will never be just the two of us but there will always be US so I need to embrace every moment of that.
Oh, and by the way, kids broke BOTH glass tables...
Kids are like vampires. They literally suck everything out of you. My day starts at 7:15am and goes until 1am. Even when the kids are at school, I still eat, breathe, think and smell kids. I use my few hours to squeeze in my oh-so important run/swim. I am so pressed for time that just thinking about how I am going to get my workout in stresses me out. As I run, I think about what they are doing at school, what I will feed them for dinner, etc. I constantly think about my kids.
(Six hours go by and haven't spoken to other half or thought about other half. Very busy day)
There was once a time in my life when all I ever thought about was me and X.(explained below) I never left the house without lipstick, mascara and high heels. Okay-this was about 5 years ago, but I still reminisce! Even with my first pregnancy, I still rocked the stiletto heals. Then came the baby, nursing boobies, and and the lack of desire to look good and the lack of desire period. I stopped caring about looking good as I was so consumed with the baby.
The lipstick was the first to go-I kissed the baby so often that just applying it was pointless. Then the clothes-since I was nursing, I lived in $100 t-shirts, and then thought to myself what a complete waste of money since once the "big boobies" were gone, the T's would never fit. And of course the shoes...which I still stare at in their beautiful boxes lined ever so neatly in my closet. How Carrie Bradshaw of me, right? (Except I prefer Louboutin and Barbara Bui over Manolos any day.) The heels have since been replaced by flip flops and ballet flats. Soon after, baby #2 came, and my appearance has remained the same for the past 5 years. As for the desire factor, well, I remember my dad jokingly asking when I called him on Father's Day 2005 to tell him he was going to be a grandpa again, "'What are you...the Immaculate Conception?'"
Summer 2008, I discovered running. This was a huge tipping point for me. I discovered a hobby outside my kids; something I had not had in 5 years. It started with 45 minutes here and there. I focused on making time to run and now, well, its an obsession. Remember that--I FOCUSED. I run six days a week. Working out is an obsession for me. When I don't run, I swim and on some days, I do both. Since that summer, I have transformed into a completely different person. The "old" me is back except without all the war paint and uncomfortable shoes. Did you read what I just said? The "old" me--NOT!
Once upon a time, there was this Girl who fell in love with a wonderful Man. He was big, tall, and had a lot of dark hair. For this blog, let's call him X. X was funny. He made her laugh. She would get butterflies waiting for X at a bar, restaurant, or wherever they were meeting. In a crowded room, they could always find each other; they would some how make eye contact in a crowd and he would wink from afar. They would travel. It was Paris for Valentine's Day one year. Dinners at trendy NYC restaurants. Weekends in Healdsburg.
First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes someone in the baby carriage.....
When Girl was pregnant, they agreed that they wouldn't eat at chain restaurants, that they would still "have a life," that dad would be able to have his free time everyday after work, that they would keep all of their really nice glass tables, and here's the best one, that nothing between them would ever change.
Rule #1-Before baby is born, don't make promises of any kind regarding your so-called new life.
Rule #2-Don't be a food snob.
Rule #3-Your so-called life changes
Rule #4-you despise the fact that X still gets to have a life
Rule #5-Glass BREAKS
Rule #6-This is the most important. Your relationship with your partner is about to change forever.
If you follow these steps, you should have a perfect relationship!
5 years have gone by and things are very different. As a stay at home parent, I take on the full time role of being that Super Woman. I changed diapers, baths, Dr.'s appointments, activities, play dates, etc. The list goes on and on. After being out for most of the day doing these things, its then dinner, baths, cleaning up the house, folding the laundry, and trying to get the house somewhat organized before X comes home. Oh X-remember the person who used to make your stomach twitter with excitement? The only twitter I have now is my Twitter account that I don't even use. I am sick of pizza, chicken fingers and french fries. When I walk into Johnny Rockets, they know our order. By the time kids are fed, bathed, and put to bed, its just about 8pm. That gives me almost 2 hours to spend with X, and a large portion of that is spent in the kitchen getting our dinner ready and cleaning.
Now, I still love X. But X too has changed. For one, he doesn't have all the hair he used too...(I'm just being honest here.) I can't remember the last time we had a conversation that lasted more than 30 minutes uninterrupted (phone, blackberry, crying kid, disagreement, knock on the door. What happened to our promise that nothing would ever change? Were we really that naive about our new mission we were about to embark on? The answer is YES.
As I ran my long 2 hour run today, I thought about if I focused on X as much as I do my kids or even running for that matter, what would be left of me? Is it possible to carve out any more time in my day? You see, carving out time could be something simple as a small kind gesture. For X, it maybe writing a note in his suitcase like I used to. Or picking out a tie. These gestures don't take any addtional time in one's day. It just takes being thoughtful and I know X would love any attention thrown his way.
X was and is my original baby yet is treated more like the step-child. I feel bad saying it but its true. Being a good mother has taken all of me but has turned me into a neglectful partner. If I were the kind of parent that I am partner, well....let's just say, the kids might not be living with their mama. I am a terrific mother but a mediocre wife. It will never be just the two of us but there will always be US so I need to embrace every moment of that.
Oh, and by the way, kids broke BOTH glass tables...
Thursday, September 17, 2009
CHANGE
What is change and why are people so afraid of it? Change is to make different; a transformation. Change is something that presses us out of our comfort zone. But why is change viewed as negativity or a threat? Why aren't we open to change?
I experienced my first taste of Mean Girls today except through a very unlikely group--moms. For this entry, I will refer to them as the Mean Girls. I have been pouring my heart and soul into working on my daughter's Halloween Carnival at her school. I took on the title of "Chair" because the school was going to cancel the event. I have worked hard on this event-squeezing it in between my runs/pickups/kids activities, etc. My house could be a haunted house right now with all the halloween crap that I have purchased!
The event in the past has been mediore at best, or like the kids have told me-IT SUCKS. I decided to transform it into FABULOSITY! I have brought in new games, props, a DJ, professional face painter, and an improved haunted house. I thought parents/kids would be excited, right? NOOOO. I woke up this morning to find my inbox FILLED with emails from moms, 8th grade moms to be exact. They were not supportive of my changes and basically told me that I could not make these changes. Hello, I am the Chair of this event!! Anyhow, not to let a title gt the best of me, I tried to assure here that I had a lot of great ideas but she was NOT hearing it. Another mom even called me only to insult me by saying "'you're just a kindergarten parent.'" Excuse me? WTF?
Mean Girls. Remember the movie with Lindsay Lohan? If you are a parent and haven't seen it-rent it on netflix tonight. It's a mean world out there on the playground and even uglier with parents, especially the ones who live though their kids. (think angry soccer parents) It never really dawned on me that this is/could be learned at home. I mean yes, I know kids mimmick their parents but I kind of always figured meanness was just something you were born with. But the meanness I experienced today got me to worry about their kids. Were their kids mean? Was their mean kid my kid's school big sister/brother? I am convinved that this parent probably doesn't even know she is mean, or better yet, if she does, she tries to use it for power. Bullying is not power. Its weakness and shows insecurity. Instead of incorporating her ideas with my changes , this "bully" threated to have her 8th Grade class boycott my event. How would she explain this boycott to her kids or class for that matter? This bully is unknowingly teaching meanness. Would she actually explain to the kids that they were boycotting our event because I moved the haunted house from inside the cafeteria to outside in the courtyard? This is the kind of behavior that we are supposed to teach our kids not to act out. How could someone be this mean over a happy halloween carnival for grades k-8? Are you kidding me??!! My girls have witnessed me lose it in the car or even arguing with their father. I am not perfect, but common, what mom says to another mom, "'you're just a kindergarten parent?'" A really mean and lame mom that's who!
I took on this task for my daughter. It's the only fundraiser geard for the kids. I want her to see how involved I am with her school and to be proud that I am there to help contribute and make it a better place. However, I do not wish to partake in cattyness with moms or anyone for that matter. I write this story today to share with you my experience not to dwell on it.
The Mean Girls took it upon themselves to contact "the powers that be." They pleaded their case, or lack of, and tried hard to undermine all of my hard work and Change, all along I not knowing. The "powers that be" forwarded their messages to me along with their reply:
Michelle stepped forward to chair the Carnival because no one else did. We should welcome the new ideas and respectfully work with her. I am confident that it will be a great event.
I experienced my first taste of Mean Girls today except through a very unlikely group--moms. For this entry, I will refer to them as the Mean Girls. I have been pouring my heart and soul into working on my daughter's Halloween Carnival at her school. I took on the title of "Chair" because the school was going to cancel the event. I have worked hard on this event-squeezing it in between my runs/pickups/kids activities, etc. My house could be a haunted house right now with all the halloween crap that I have purchased!
The event in the past has been mediore at best, or like the kids have told me-IT SUCKS. I decided to transform it into FABULOSITY! I have brought in new games, props, a DJ, professional face painter, and an improved haunted house. I thought parents/kids would be excited, right? NOOOO. I woke up this morning to find my inbox FILLED with emails from moms, 8th grade moms to be exact. They were not supportive of my changes and basically told me that I could not make these changes. Hello, I am the Chair of this event!! Anyhow, not to let a title gt the best of me, I tried to assure here that I had a lot of great ideas but she was NOT hearing it. Another mom even called me only to insult me by saying "'you're just a kindergarten parent.'" Excuse me? WTF?
Mean Girls. Remember the movie with Lindsay Lohan? If you are a parent and haven't seen it-rent it on netflix tonight. It's a mean world out there on the playground and even uglier with parents, especially the ones who live though their kids. (think angry soccer parents) It never really dawned on me that this is/could be learned at home. I mean yes, I know kids mimmick their parents but I kind of always figured meanness was just something you were born with. But the meanness I experienced today got me to worry about their kids. Were their kids mean? Was their mean kid my kid's school big sister/brother? I am convinved that this parent probably doesn't even know she is mean, or better yet, if she does, she tries to use it for power. Bullying is not power. Its weakness and shows insecurity. Instead of incorporating her ideas with my changes , this "bully" threated to have her 8th Grade class boycott my event. How would she explain this boycott to her kids or class for that matter? This bully is unknowingly teaching meanness. Would she actually explain to the kids that they were boycotting our event because I moved the haunted house from inside the cafeteria to outside in the courtyard? This is the kind of behavior that we are supposed to teach our kids not to act out. How could someone be this mean over a happy halloween carnival for grades k-8? Are you kidding me??!! My girls have witnessed me lose it in the car or even arguing with their father. I am not perfect, but common, what mom says to another mom, "'you're just a kindergarten parent?'" A really mean and lame mom that's who!
I took on this task for my daughter. It's the only fundraiser geard for the kids. I want her to see how involved I am with her school and to be proud that I am there to help contribute and make it a better place. However, I do not wish to partake in cattyness with moms or anyone for that matter. I write this story today to share with you my experience not to dwell on it.
The Mean Girls took it upon themselves to contact "the powers that be." They pleaded their case, or lack of, and tried hard to undermine all of my hard work and Change, all along I not knowing. The "powers that be" forwarded their messages to me along with their reply:
Michelle stepped forward to chair the Carnival because no one else did. We should welcome the new ideas and respectfully work with her. I am confident that it will be a great event.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Week 4 of Kindergarten
This marks week 4 of kindergarten. It's been an interesting few weeks. Bedtime has gone from 8pm, to 7:30pm, to 7:00pm today. Girls are exhausted!! I had to cut out swimming midweek because the meltdown that follows just isn't worth it. Getting used to a routine in the morning--7:00am alarm followed by washing faces/combing hair, and breakfast. Breakfast is actually getting better! Easy-to-make items are key: frozen pancakes (45 seconds), yogurt, pop tarts (don't ask!) bacon (microwave 2:30 min), toast. 7:45am we're putting on clothes and then walking out the door! It happens so quickly. By the time we get to the first school (8:00am), there is 5 minutes before the bell rings to check out the scene.
Stroll home by 8:20am, stuff something in my mouth (the oatmeal breakfast hasn't been working with new school schedule....) and then its time to jump in the car and head to the Presidio. I have figured out that the best way to enter the Presidio is NOT through the Lombard gate but rather going towards the bridge and remain in the left lane. This lane turns into the middle of the Presidio (Halleck) so once in, you can make a right turn for East Beach of a left turn towards YMCA. Literally saves you 5 minutes-which is extremely valuable for me!
Drop off the little one at school and then hurry back towards East Beach. Squeeze in a short run and then hurry home to shower/grocery shop and then its back to pick up Lucy. Time flies! In between all of this, I am trying to get donations for schools and shop for Halloween Carnival-Chairing for Lola's school..... Once I pick up Lucy, it's lunch...ugh..it's Tuesday and she wants Johny Rocket's. No, not again!! Cave in, have a burger and eat almost all of HER fries (there goes the 5 miler). Then we rush out of there to hit up Walgreens-wipe them out of almost their entire Halloween sections (for carnival) have I mentioned that I have been stalking all the Walgreens/Halloween stores for the past 2 weeks??!!...oh shit! It's 2:15pm now and I am supposed to pick up Lola at 2:20pm. Yes-I am late. I feel like a bad mom because my kid will be the last one picked up. I show up late and they are not even waiting for me! They have brought her inside. She is playing in the yard. She is okay. I tell her I am sorry but she doesn't care. I apologize to the school and blame it on Walgreens and emphasize how I was shopping for THE SCHOOL CARNIVAL!! Okay-time to rush home, gets kids changed and ready for ballet class at 3:30pm. Arrive at ballet on time-leave to hit up a few more stores for donations for Bal de Paris fundraiser at Lola's school. With my aggressive and very persuasive charm, manage to score 3 donations. Now I am hungry. Do I cave in for the delicious chocolate brownie at Starbucks? Settle for a Venti Black Ice Tea and a Think Thin Protein Bar.....boring. Grab 2 cookies for the girls and watch the last 15 minutes of ballet. Go home. Make a bath for the girls. Prepare them dinner: fillet Mignon, broccoli and pasta. Grapes for Lucy. Apples for Lola. As soon as dinner is over, daddy walks in the door. Bed time is in 30 minutes.
Girls are in bed. Dinner with Chris followed by working on school fundraising until midnight. Manage to squeeze in a few minutes to check out Perez Hilton-I needed my "Hollywood" fix. (Reminiscing my NYC PR days.......) Continue searching for carnival stuff, ideas, post art ad and writing school Room Parent letter. 12:30am now...time for bed!
How many days left until the end of the week!
Stroll home by 8:20am, stuff something in my mouth (the oatmeal breakfast hasn't been working with new school schedule....) and then its time to jump in the car and head to the Presidio. I have figured out that the best way to enter the Presidio is NOT through the Lombard gate but rather going towards the bridge and remain in the left lane. This lane turns into the middle of the Presidio (Halleck) so once in, you can make a right turn for East Beach of a left turn towards YMCA. Literally saves you 5 minutes-which is extremely valuable for me!
Drop off the little one at school and then hurry back towards East Beach. Squeeze in a short run and then hurry home to shower/grocery shop and then its back to pick up Lucy. Time flies! In between all of this, I am trying to get donations for schools and shop for Halloween Carnival-Chairing for Lola's school..... Once I pick up Lucy, it's lunch...ugh..it's Tuesday and she wants Johny Rocket's. No, not again!! Cave in, have a burger and eat almost all of HER fries (there goes the 5 miler). Then we rush out of there to hit up Walgreens-wipe them out of almost their entire Halloween sections (for carnival) have I mentioned that I have been stalking all the Walgreens/Halloween stores for the past 2 weeks??!!...oh shit! It's 2:15pm now and I am supposed to pick up Lola at 2:20pm. Yes-I am late. I feel like a bad mom because my kid will be the last one picked up. I show up late and they are not even waiting for me! They have brought her inside. She is playing in the yard. She is okay. I tell her I am sorry but she doesn't care. I apologize to the school and blame it on Walgreens and emphasize how I was shopping for THE SCHOOL CARNIVAL!! Okay-time to rush home, gets kids changed and ready for ballet class at 3:30pm. Arrive at ballet on time-leave to hit up a few more stores for donations for Bal de Paris fundraiser at Lola's school. With my aggressive and very persuasive charm, manage to score 3 donations. Now I am hungry. Do I cave in for the delicious chocolate brownie at Starbucks? Settle for a Venti Black Ice Tea and a Think Thin Protein Bar.....boring. Grab 2 cookies for the girls and watch the last 15 minutes of ballet. Go home. Make a bath for the girls. Prepare them dinner: fillet Mignon, broccoli and pasta. Grapes for Lucy. Apples for Lola. As soon as dinner is over, daddy walks in the door. Bed time is in 30 minutes.
Girls are in bed. Dinner with Chris followed by working on school fundraising until midnight. Manage to squeeze in a few minutes to check out Perez Hilton-I needed my "Hollywood" fix. (Reminiscing my NYC PR days.......) Continue searching for carnival stuff, ideas, post art ad and writing school Room Parent letter. 12:30am now...time for bed!
How many days left until the end of the week!
New Beginnings
Hello friends and followers! My name is Michelle Larson and I am proud to be a mom in San Francisco. Married for 5 years, I have 2 daughters, 5 &3.5 years. My oldest just started kindergarten and my youngest a new preschool. With both kids gone in the mornings, or at least until 12 noon, you would think that I have tons of free time to kick back on the couch and watch The View, right?? WRONG!! I hope you will follow me through my daily/weekly adventures of juggling schedules, volunteering at schools, managing a household, making time for my husband (did I mention sex?!) and training for my first marathon! Yes-exciting times ahead in our household.
I hope this blog will be fun reading, an informational source and outlet for all the busy moms and dads out there. I promise to do my best to be as truthful as possible--though that is usually never a problem for me! You make not agree with what I have to say so take what you will and just remember, it's not personal. It's just me.
Michelle
I hope this blog will be fun reading, an informational source and outlet for all the busy moms and dads out there. I promise to do my best to be as truthful as possible--though that is usually never a problem for me! You make not agree with what I have to say so take what you will and just remember, it's not personal. It's just me.
Michelle
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